


The New World; LeeSaku; (I Will Protect you) With my Life

by Narutard (FashionFable)



Category: Boruto: Naruto Next Generations, Naruto, ロック・リーの青春フルパワー忍伝 | Rock Lee's Springtime of Youth | Rock Lee & His Ninja Pals
Genre: 69 (Sex Position), Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Dark, Anal Sex, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Asexual Character, Ass Play, Awkward First Times, Awkward Romance, Bisexual Male Character, Blow Jobs, Bottom Rock Lee, Comfort Sex, Cunnilingus, Dom Haruno Sakura, Dom/sub Undertones, Domestic Fluff, Double Agents, Emotional Baggage, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotions, F/M, Femdom, Fluff and Smut, Forced Ejaculation, Forced Orgasm, Forehead Kisses, Foreplay, Friends to Lovers, Friendship/Love, Grief/Mourning, I'm Going to Hell, Implied Consent, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Just Add Ninjas, M/M, Making Love, Making Out, Male Friendship, Male-Female Friendship, Multi, Non-Canon Relationship, Pegging, Polyamorous Character, Polyamory Negotiations, Porn With Plot, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Post-War, Protectiveness, Queer Character, Queer Het, Rimming, Rough Sex, Sensation Play, Sensory Deprivation, Sex Toys, Smut, Spies & Secret Agents, Survival, Survivor Guilt, Threesome - F/F/M, Threesome - F/M/M, Unrequited Love, Vaginal Sex, Vulnerability
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-28
Updated: 2018-01-04
Packaged: 2019-02-22 20:05:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 6
Words: 40,094
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13174248
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FashionFable/pseuds/Narutard
Summary: SakiBishoujo,Yozakura-ko,Koibito…Blossom of Hope, Beautiful girl, Child of the cherry trees by night, The object of my affection...Lee has been drafted into Anbu and has become wiser, quieter and less optimistic. He learns of a plot to kill Sakura and saves her without dramatic heroics. Maybe, Lee can teah her the Eight Gates and she can finally stop Sasuke.This is a hurt/comfort and angst/smut romance between two very broken people trying to survive and protect the friends that remain in an equally broken world.





	1. A renewal of a vow; a promise of protection

**Author's Note:**

  * For [tineyninja](https://archiveofourown.org/users/tineyninja/gifts), [RussianHatter](https://archiveofourown.org/users/RussianHatter/gifts), [The_Utterly_Clumsy_Ninja](https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Utterly_Clumsy_Ninja/gifts).



> Inspired by The New World by tineyninja, this tskes place in a dark au where Sasuke killed Narto and became hokage. 
> 
> I wrote an Omake and my drabbld turned into this fic. I am hoping tineyninja likes it and may use it.
> 
> Takes place after chapter 45.
> 
> Sakura is training to master the Eight Gates under Gai. Sasuke is the hokage. Naruto, Kiba and Neji are dead. Kakashi is a sex slave to Sasuke. Its a dark fic. I think Lee should discover what she is up to and side with her. I am not tineyninja but I love her fic.
> 
> Update: There are mentions of Lee/Sai and Lee/Tenten and I will be adding a Sai/Lee/Sakura M/M/F where Lee is the middle. :) Cus eh why not. Just read it, it will make sense.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Unbeknownst to her, an attempt is made on Sakura's life. Lee steps in to protect her anyway that he can, even a fake relaionship. Her life is not the only one at stake in this insane New World of Sasuke's.

“Sakura-san!” Sakura stopped short as a dark-green clad figure dropped down before her into a crouch. She pulled back defensively, suddenly on edge. She had not felt him coming and wondered if he hopped down from a tree, a fence or a rooftop. Were there others? Had her intentions been discovered? She tried to hide the tremble in her hand as she steadied her grocery bags on her arms, spilling her fresh tea that she had only just purchased and was about to have her first sip from.

 

Sakura felt watched since she came to the realization that Gai, her new sensei, was in love with her old, quite captive sensei and therefore in danger. She knew that Sasuke may have someone watching her movements, following her training. He was a paranoid little bastard and at this point had every right to be. She opened her eyes as she felt one of her bags gently pulled from her wrist, the tea also pried from her hand just as timidly. The figure stood up straight before her. He tilted up his anbu mask and pushed it to the side of his head before shaking out his dark, shiny hair. He chuckled with a wide smile, then began gathering her things.

“Lee?” She held in a sigh, trying to mask her joy in seeing a friend inside the village again, trying to hide the relief in her voice. “Hey, oh don’t do that! I can handle this myself!” She scrambled for the tea only to have Lee take her second bag. She stumbled slightly and Lee rebalanced the bags on one arm, dropping the takeout cup in favour of not burning Sakura or himself with it. He blushed slightly and frowned as he steadied her, his big, dark eyes searching her for injuries.

“Sakura-san.” He spoke softly, as if contemplating his words. Sakura bit her lip. Lee was never so reserved. The war had changed all of the remaining Konoha 11. They all made sacrifices to survive and rarely saw each other. “Sakura-san,” He started again, looking away briefly before focusing on her again, “It is good to see you again!” Lee gasped softly and released her, forgetting he was still clutching her. He bowed lowly, “Sakura-san, I am so sorry about your tea! I am so clumsy. Please, let me walk you home! As punishment I will-!” Sakura giggled and interrupted Lee with a hug, her bags slumping in his arms on impact.

“Lee, it’s so good to see you again!” she squeezed hard and he squeezed back reassuringly. His eyes widened for a brief moment at her intensity before he caught himself. Sakura never hugged him back. He pulled back, putting her bags in one arm held her tightly with the other again. Sakura buried her head on his chest, her demureness catching him off guard.

“I missed you, too!” He proclaimed loudly before gently putting her bags on the ground and ducking his head as if to sniff her hair. Despite now being in Anbu, he still wore his green spandex, now in an Anbu style. He whispered as smelled her hair, “You are in danger.” He paused to press a kiss to her cheek, “And I suspect Gai-sensei is as well.” Lee pulled away, his gaze serious but smile as bright as ever. He gave her another squeeze, nearly lifting her off her feet. “Sakura-san, let me,” he whispered, “pretend to,” he continued normally, “be your boyfriend,” he whispered once more, “if you want to visit your sensei safely.” He ran his fingers through her hair as he pulled away, letting the pink locks slip through his gloved fingers.He seemed to be analyzing her expression as he stepped closer, blocking her from view against the fence. He slid one arm around her waist and pressed the other up against the fence as he boldly maneuvered her. He hoped he blocked the momentary look of shock on her face, “We must also find a way to protect mine.” He waited a moment more before she nodded and he pulled away, satisfied that she understood. Lee lifted her bags once more, pulling her from the fence back to her feet and gestured down the street with his head. “Come, Sakura-san.” He eyed the items in her bag, “I shall make you dinner!” He considered putting an arm out for her to take but knew this was undignified for her as it is. He paused, looking over his shoulder with a whisper. “Let’s go,” he added quickly,”please.”

“Wait, Lee!” Sakura nearly stuttered as she ran to catch up with his long strides. She blinked a moment before he met her gaze with a soft smile and offered his arm,

“Yes, Sakura-san.” He paused his speech as he gazed around Konoha as casually as he could, “I will always wait for you.” He took her hand on his arm and pressed a kiss softly, chuckling at her small growl. He sighed internally, wishing this were a joyful experience.

 

Lee watched her with a serious gaze as they waited to cross the street and Sakura no longer knew what was behind those once innocent doll eyes. The fire behind them had dimmed since the war as they all faced the grim reality of obedience to their “hokage.” Lee had nearly joined the ranks of the dead had Gai-sensei not needed him to help recover. Lee did not want to bow to Sasuke but he had to, for Gai, for Tenten. He didn't even know how he made Tenten agree to it. Gai-sensei had been unconscious, Neji slain, Tenten in shock, Kiba killed by Sasuke for defying his rule. Naruto. Poor Naruto, his dear friend and rival, was also gone. The kage were slain too and all those closest to them. Sai was now his Anbu partner since he was drafted. Sai taught him to shut down his emotions, to fake his feelings. He would honour Sai’s kindness by helping Sakura do the same, to help her survive.

 

He pulled Sakura along as her lips quirked to speak, trying not to break his cover. She tugged gently and he faced her, a small blaze burning in his eyes as if he was staring into her soul, pleading with her not to speak.

“Lee!” She went on anyways and he bit his lip to stop himself from an outburst. He closed his eyes briefly.

“Yes, Sakura-san?” He spoke with a tinge of annoyance but was respectful as usual. His brows furrowed slightly in concentration as he listened around them. Sakura frowned. She was not the only one on edge.

“Are you off for the rest of the day?” He looked around casually and then up at the cloudy sky, “I feel you are distracted, Lee-kun.” She looked up at him but he blinked before turning away slightly, avoiding her gaze. It was a movement she was familiar with from Kakashi.

Lee never had issues with eye contact before. He smiled softly and chuckled, “Yes, Sakura-chan. I am technically off duty but Anbu are never truly idle.” She gave a small sound in reply and watched her feet as they continued, also listening for hidden followers and seeking chakra signatures. As a medic, Sakura knew everyone in the village by now. An assassin would likely be someone she knew anyways, perhaps someone she trusted. Her grip tightened unconsciously on Lee’s arm and he pretended not to notice as he quickened their pace. He bumped his shoulder slightly to hers and gave a small wink before ducking his head beside hers. He had gotten so much taller than her now, she would have to tiptoe to whisper to him.

“Three.” He whispered, then paused as he waited for another opportunity, “Sai is among them. I trust him.”

“The others?” Sakura pressed a cheek to his shoulder. She was exhausted after her double shift and training with Gai-sensei. She shifted her arm to wrap around Lee’s waist and waited for him to respond.

“Unknown. I am being followed, too.” He pressed a kiss to her temple. “I never go back on my word.” Lee gave her a soft smile before his eyes darted away again, “I will always protect you with my life, Sakura-san.” He paused and turned to face her, his eyes hidden under his bangs. His hair had gotten longer and scruffy since the war, its luster dimmed a bit. Sakura frowned slightly as his eyes met her, “To protect my most precious people is my ninja way.” Lee straightened up and looked left and right before continuing again, “May I still walk you home?” He closed his eyes briefly, in either agony or prayer, waiting on the rejection to come. He interrupted her thoughts, stepping forward. She gasped slightly as his hand pressed reassuringly to her shoulder and his forehead brushed hers, “We are alone now.You may speak freely but briefly.”

“Take me home, Lee. Please.” His thick brows lifted in surprise then he smiled softly with a sharp nod.

“Yosh.”

 

At Sakura’s door, Lee waited for her to disarm her traps and inspected the perimeter quickly before allowing her inside. He stepped in front of when she turned the key in the door, gently stopping her with a palm on her shoulder. “Ladies first but please, allow me to escort you, Sakura-san.” Sakura raised a brow, unused to Lee being so assertive with her. “Stay close.” He added quickly again, “Please.” She looked around him as she followed him inside, her eyes as watchful as his own. He put the groceries near the door and inspected each room, closing her blinds as he went along before finally locking the front door. He pressed back against the door, his head hitting it with a small thump as he sighed deeply.

“Lee?” Sakura frowned with a tilt of her head before approaching him. He raised his brows briefly again and then tried to step away from the door before deciding to rest on it again.

“Sakura-san, are you still injured?” She made to speak but no words came out, “Please, I would appreciate if you would not willingly try to lie to me.” He pursed his lips with a frown, “I do not want to admit my theories on why you are training with Gai-sensei, nor do I want to reveal to you that I have been secretly watching you train.”

“Lee!” She gasped and covered her mouth. He looked to the floor then up sharply.

“Please, let me finish.” His tone was harsher than usual as he held a finger up, his gaze returning to his feet. “Sakura-san. I know about your sensei.” His eyes closed, his expression painful at her gasp. “I was ordered to watch you and Gai-sensei. I wanted to know why he is so sad. I know it is not just because of Neji’s death. I know he loves Kakashi-sensei and I know what happened between them.” He wrapped his arms around himself and seemed to fold inward as tears gathered in his eyes. He looked around her place gesturing with a finger, “I already swept your place for bugs and traps before you went to train with Gai-sensei. I know Sasuke wants me to keep you from Kakashi-sensei. He feels you are too close. He was going to order someone to seduce you, to find out if Kakashi-sensei is romantically involved with you.” She bit her lip as he continued to watch his feet. “Please, put your things away.” He gestured to the groceries before continuing as Sakura startled and began to do as commanded, “Sasuke remembers my promise to you but also my declaration of love. I would not allow such action. I told Hokage-sama you are my lover.” A stack of tuna cans tumbled out the cupboard to the floor and Lee bit his tongue, turning away, ready to apologize, “Sakura-san! If I would not have, he would-!” His voice cracked, “Poor, Gai-sensei! How do I get him to give up on his Most Precious Love without breaking his heart! If Gai-sensei finds out-!” He choked again, his knees giving out as he began to sob, braced against the door by one shoulder, slumped to the floor, “Gai-sensei!” He found Sakura’s arms around him on a tight embrace and he let his tears fall as Sakura cooed softly, cheek against his shoulder. “Sakura-san! Poor Tenten has not been the same since Neji’s death! We have all been forced to do terrible things to survive. I just, I just want this to be over!” His body went limp in her arms as he sobbed, soaking her shirt.

“Oh, Lee!” She held her own tears in as she held him tightly. She wanted to tell him everything would be okay, she really did but this was reality.

Sakura-san.” He tried to look up at her but his eyes were blurred with tears, Sakura’s image was a swirl of pink before him, “I know because Sasuke-sama only has a handful of trusted Anbu. Some of us he puts on guard duty to teach us a lesson on loyalty. If even Kakashi-sensei can be… brought, to his knees and…” He cried some more.

“Wait, you and Sai know what is happening to Kakashi-sensei!?” Lee seemed to freeze for a moment. Sakura punched his arm lightly and he nodded. “Who else knows?” Lee looked away, crying again.

“This does not matter, Sakura-san! Gai-sensei feels his love for Kakashi-sensei is not unrequited. He will get himself killed!” Lee gripped her shoulders in a crushing embrace and wailed. “I can’t, I can’t keep doing this! Witnessing terrible things and allowing them to happen! If Gai-sensei were to lose one of us again, if Kakashi-sensei-! If only I could use ninjutsu or could open more gates like Gai-sensei!”

“Lee, stop! That will only t you killed, too!” She nearly slapped him to startle him out of it but decided not to, “Hey! Lee!” She pulled him to her and twisted him so his back was to her chest and let her hands glow, soothing him as she massaged his head, “Calm down, okay. None of us are dead. We will figure this out.” Lee sobbed bitterly and the sound was breaking her heart. He lay down with his head in her lap as her chakra sedated him.

“Please, Sakura-san, don’t.” He shoved at her hands weakly, trying to pry her fingers from stroking his hair, “I need to keep you safe! Don’t sedate me!” He struggled to keep an eye open, “The tea. It was poisoned.” He shook his head, “I must protect you.” His eyes fluttered as he struggled against her technique.

“Alright. You can start by spending the night here, loverboy. We will figure this out.” He grunted weakly in reply before falling asleep. “Tonight, I will protect you. Please,” as she looked him over, she noticed his haggard appearance, his hair longer than his standard bowl cut, his skin ashen instead of tan and the dark circles under his eyes, “You look exhausted. Let me help you sleep.” Sakura says it with such sweetness Lee can almost pretend things will be ok.

“Do not-!” He stammered softly as his hand tightened around her wrist, he would not submit to her sleep skill so easily! Not yet! “Do not go after him, like last time, Sakura-san. You need training.” He tried to sit up and failed, “If you wish to kill Sasuke, I will train you and I will help you.”

 

In his sleep he continued to murmur her name as Sakura used the last of her strength to take him to her bed. She removed his armor, bindings, gloves, mask and shoes and tucked the blanket around him. Exhausted, she reached over to turn on her alarm, tinkered with it briefly and fell asleep against him above the covers. Lee comes to quickly, his strengrh of will defiant as always as his heart blazes passionately. He pulls her tightly to his chest, wrapping an exhausted Sakura protectively in his arms, then whispers in her ear, "I will protect you with my life, I swear it."

 

When Lee wakes again it's to the wintergreen mint of her shampoo. He can smell her all around him, his body responding to the sudden lack of comfort and body hea. His hand snaps out automatically and she tries not to startle. He can see it on her face that Sakura is afraid there is another anbu stalking her house. He shakes his head with a gentle smile and almost lets her wrist go only to rub it gently with his thumb. This bruise matches his thumb perfectly, from the struggle to stop her from forcing him to sleep the night before. She hums at his touch and does not resist as he sits up and pulls her gently into his embrace. He wipes her tears and smiles softly with a tilt of his head.

“Sakura-san is so strong.” Her lip trembles and she turns away as her eyes slide shut.

 

“Don’t!” She bites her lip until it bleeds, holding back tears but she no longer tries to escape. She internalizes her mistakes. She loved the bastard that is ruining the lives of everyone in the village. She should have killed him when she could. She did not. She could not. Now Lee wants to throw his life away to protect her, so protect their respective sensei. His doll eyes bore down on her from beneath his bangs and it is burning a hole through her. “Don’t look at me like that, don't worship me.”He looks at her reverently, she is his goddess and he is the one who has sinned. “I am the one who doesn’t deserve your goodness, Lee. This is my fault. I got Naruto killed. I couldn’t stop Sasuke when I had the chance. Now this is all my fault.” He sits up and wraps his legs around her. Her alarm clock starts to ring and he grabs her hair gently, smelling it deeply before he leans back to turn off the clock.

 

“Sakura-san.” He breathes out, half remorseful and half hopeful, “We have all made mistakes.”

“I’m selfish.” She leans back into his touch, allowing this moment before she cuts herself off from the world again and throws herself into training harder.

“I am as well. I should have died a martyr like Kiba, I should have challenged Sasuke, I should have saved you!” He leans a cheek against her shoulder as she leans into his touch.

“I was so mean to you, Lee! You are the least selfish person I know. I used to bring you flowers while you slept, recovering in the hospital after the exams.” Lee’s genuine smile returned for a brief moment.

 

“I know this. The thought that someone cared enough to visit, kept me going.” He takes his chin and tilts her to face him as he runs his fingers through her hair. “I am very selfish though.” He goes quiet, taking in every detail of her face, “Since the war, I have seen many injustice and have turned the other way.” He looks away, “I have offered comfort to others and taken comfort in others when opportunities have arisen.” Sakura does not respond as he continues, “I have not waited for my most precious person and no matter how hard I have tried, to forget all that troubles me, to forget you?” He shakes his head, his eyes pleading with her, “I cannot forget what I have done, what I have allowed to happen.” He tries to pull away and she grasps his hand, not allowing it to leave her cheek. “Sakura, I am unworthy and impure.” He grits his teeth, “Even in this moment I want nothing more than to lay with you.” Sakura smiles softly, then she laughs. It is bitter and humourless.

 

“Prove it!”She challenges him.

“What?” He leans back and she turns in his lap, pushes his shoulder to the bed.

“That makes what we both want easier.” She takes a deep breath and straddles him. Lee backs up until he hits the headboard. She crawls with him and pins his hands to his sides with her strength. He grunts and shifts as she settles on his morning hardness.

 

Lee tries to cut his chakra supply. This must be a dream or a genjutsu. He turns and bites his own shoulder. He looks around for hidden weapons ready to slide to his throat and reaches out his senses. This really is Sakura his mind tells him but it can't be. She smiles softly, sadly at him. “You are the same person, Lee.” She shakes her head and swings one thigh off of him, “My poor, sweet, Lee.”

 

Before her lap rises more than an inch, Sakura finds his hands around her hips and his forehead pressed to hers. Their height difference brings him up to face her as he sits up a bit higher.

“Sakura-san.” He grits out between his teeth as he tries to hold back, “Do not mock me.” He leans back and releases her only to find the same fire burning in her eyes.

 

She presses forward, pinning his shoulder to the wall as her other hand guides his under her red dress. She leans forward and licks his bottom lip and bites it gently as she pulls back, grinding herself against him. “You talk too much. I refuse to save myself for that bastard anymore.” Lee’s eyes go wide and she grabs his cheeks, kisses him hard. He pulls back.

“Sakura-san, I will not allow you to regret this!” She bites her lip and grabs his wrist as he tries to pull away.

“You talk too much. Chivalry is dead and Sasuke killed it. Just shut up.” She leans in and suckles his neck before scraping it with her teeth. Lee gasps and holds in a moan.

 

“Sakura-san, I do not want to be one of your, ah, regrets!” He gasps as she grinds down on his lap then lifts to slide her panties down. Lee groans. It’s been a while and he can’t deny he has always imagined this. She licks up his neck, tonguing his pulse and pulling his turtleneck aside. He realizes after a moment Sakura is more experienced than he initially thought. He leans forward and tilts his head, sealing their lips in a searing kiss before his mind can keep up with her. “Ah, Sakura-san!” She shuts him up with a kiss, her full lips pressing against his slow and sensual before her tongue sneaks out to prod between his own lips. His mind is reeling from the sensations as he tries to pull back. “This is a bad idea.” He groans as she lifts his shirt slowly up his chest, taking her time to feel his muscles flex beneath her trained fingers. They glow slightly at the tips and he finds himself gasping. He wonders if she has drugged him with an aphrodisiac or is applying some other jutsu to his body. Lee shakes his head as it falls back to her pillow and she pulls his hips down so he is lower on the bed, taking his pants with it. Lee knows he is just this sensitive to being touched, being cuddled. He is passionate and sensitive and even though Tenten said it was a mistake between two friends, they both enjoyed the experience and those that followed. He gasps as Sakura continues to lick and kiss all over his bare chest, sits up as her breath and lips and tongue ghost over his abdomen.

 

“We can stop if you change your mind.” The words in his mind echo Sakura’s at the same time. She licks at his belly button and kisses his skin softly as she follows the light trail of hair dusting his stomach. His fingers come up weakly to brush the tips of her bangs as she pulls his underwear with her teeth. His lips part in anticipation as time slows down. He has done this and more with Tenten and a handful of civilian lovers but it has never been as intense as having Sakura do this for real. He is powerless to ask her to stop again.

 

Sakura loves how sensitive he is. She has tried to date since the end of the war, throwing herself into relationships to forget. Her hours at the hospital interfere with her attempts and then finding out about Kakashi’s situation was a complete buzz kill. She had been putting all of her time and energy into healing Gai-sensei, rehabilitating Yamato’s fragile mind and body, healing Kakashi when he will allow it. She has not had time for herself.

 

She allows Lee a moment to back out of this, releasing her hold on his last piece of clothing as she unzips her dress and slowly, seductively, shrugs out of it. Lee bites his lip and she smiles shyly at him. “Lee.” She speaks soft but assertive, “No matter what, you will always be my friend.” She rolls her eyes, “Even if I can’t look at you the same way again after this.” Lee chuckles. His smile is soft and his cheeks are flushed. He gives a nod and reaches out a hand.

“Please, may I kiss you, Sakura-san?”

“You already have. Quit being so formal!” She shrugs and runs her hand over his underwear. He bites back a groan and his lip. She smiles wickedly.

“I liked to have permission.” Lee smiles very softly. His eyes are full of warmth, only for her. Only ever for her.

 

“I like when you ask.” Sakura smiles confidently and she leans into his embrace. He scooped her up in his arms and lays her down onto the bed with a deep moan, purring into the kiss as he slides between her thighs. Sakura smiles against his lips as he mouths softly with his own, sensually with flicks of his tongue. She has never been with someone so responsive. He pulls back slightly and adjusts himself, self conscious of his arousal. Sakura uses the opportunity to slide her hands down his defined chest, to feel his abdomen flex beneath her. Lee is taller than she remembers, his chest broader and more defined. He has grown quite handsome with time. Gone is his round face, replaced with chiseled cheeks, stubby arms and legs have given way to long, defined limbs. She can feel his strength, has seen him fight but he touches her so gently, treats  her like her namesake, a flower that wanes once it blooms. He is tentative in his touch as his hand slides to her hip. He pulls her hips to his with confidence, a gasp comes from her lips his time as his smile becomes smug, more like Gai than his usual, slightly grumpy intense frown of determination.  Her pupils dilate as he leans in for another kiss, deepening it. Gone is his embarrassment at his sounds that elicits from him, his breathing becomes even as he slides a hand beneath the small of her back. She cries out between their lips as he kisses her, his body sliding over hers as her body adjusts to his. He gasps as she wraps a hand around his length. Her head falls back against the pillow as his fingers in her thigh slide firm and smooth over it to find her entrance. Her body tenses and her thighs wrap around him as power and control shift between them once more.

 

She realizes that Lee really is no longer that sweet, innocent boy. He is a strong, capable shinobi, a weapon than could snap her in two if it wasn’t for her own hidden strength. Their heads throw back in unison as the tension builds. She lets go of him to unbind her breast bindings and he takes a deep breath, glad to take back some control over his lust but sobs at the loss of sensation. She grasps his cheeks win both hands and shifts their weight, kissing him hard, pulling him down throwing him off balance with her hip as he crashes to the bed with her, releasing a primal growl. “S-Sakura-S…” She sobers a bit at her name. Her eyebrows scrunch a bit and he corrects the honorific with a nickname, “Sakura-chan. I…” She kisses him hard to shut him up and presses his chest to the bed. He looks up with shock and a slight frown. She bites his tongue and he gasps as her fingers slide down his chest roughly. His eyes go wide once more as he takes in the sight of her bare breast. They are bigger without her bindings and he is shocked to fulfil his greatest fantasies. His mouth waters at the sight and he is at a loss for words. She smiles and holds him at a distance.

“You did not ask.” She grumbles with mock disdain. He puffs out his cheeks but his tongue is tied in shock. “No, you may not touch. You need to earn it.” Lee smiles and relaxes against the pillow. He likes challenges, especially in bed.

 

Really, Sakura is admiring his lack of scars besides the bindings still covering his hands, usually hidden behind his Anbu gloves. She takes his fingers and sucks, earning a gasp. Lee is shocked that she is equally interested in him. Lee has an amazing body. He is not nearly as broad or built as his sensei but his body is smooth, long and hard, the muscle defined. He rarely takes hits to his body; he is fast enough to avoid most direct attacks and jutsu. His hands though, she has seen before. He has broken every bone in his hands and arms from training. They both know the scars will fade in time, like Gai-sensei's did but Lee is sensitive about them.She licks his fingers until she finds the knots on his bindings, drawing his attention from her breasts. He seems to want to withdraw but doesn’t. She knows he sees the scars as badges of honour, as proof of his ninja way and she is not disgusted by them. She pulls at the knot like a puppy and Lee begins to laugh as she picks at the knot with her fingers. “Sakura-chan, you are so adorable.” He smiles. It is bittersweet. If Naruto was still alive and had called her cute like that, she would have punched him even if she was intentionally being cute. She just smiles softly at Lee, stretches and begins to suckle his fingers once more. He gasps as she licks between his fingers and at his wrists. She bites gently and moans. The texture of his wrists is so soft yet firm, as is his triceps. She moans at the texture and as he gasps she grinds her hips into him again.

 

He tries to climb on top of her once more, to take that which he seeks. Her teasing leads to impatience and Lee has never been a patient man. She forces him down once more and turns around, revealing her bare bottom. She parts her legs slowly and he gasps at the sight, trying not to grasp her and ruin the game. She crawls forward and her ass wiggles. She bends and all is revealed to him from her heart shaped ass to her pink lips, as deliciously cherry red as the ones he has kissed before. He can't breathe and begins to hyperventilate, gasping as she suddenly sniffs his crotch, nuzzling against his underwear.

 

If his fantasies, he dominates her. He makes love to her as she cries his name, begs him not to stop. In reality, the embarrassing sounds fall from his lips and he relinquishes all control. A taijutsu master in always in control of their body, their mind. They rely on no weapons, their only boundaries their strength of will, strength of body. These are qualities that make him an excellent shinobi. He cannot wait to prove to Sakura that these skills also make him an excellent lover.


	2. Shattered Lives and Broken Dreams

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lee and Sakura both try to cope with and hide the emoional baggage both have gained since the war. They give each other emotional space in the bedroom and understanding as they fall into bed together. Things are complicated but both sre determined to have one day of greedy, guilt-free happiness. Dark but spicy emotional smut ensues.
> 
> Long note but you can skip it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First off, this chapter's title is from The Crow: Shattered Lives and Broken Dreams, by James O'barr. 
> 
> Note- I am laughing at the fights I have between my cell phone and google docs' autocorrects warring with my typing and corrections. 
> 
> Funniest word added by my phone: "vancemoriobalvscar" like wtf phone!
> 
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> 
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> 
> Some of this chapter is backstory/slight filler but very emotional stuff. It doesn't affect the flow as its worked into the story and I think it's relevant. Its also to embrace some of my personal kinks and I sorta/kinda have a dirty kink for Lee's grunts/groans/cuteness so yeah, this happened. I like both his English and Japanese actors and he gives me a lady boner. Tmi? Tough shit!
> 
> I don't usually aka I never write emotionally fragile men aka sissyboys. I like my boys manly with a side of sensitive but I swear, Lee is so cute and Sakura is so assertive. I decided to play up Sakura's assertiveness, manipulative side and her caring side. I played up Lee's personality from Ninja Pals, as well as making him wiser and less innocent. This is a dystopian so yeah, sorry, not sorry.
> 
> There is nothing wrong with surrendering to bliss and kinks if you are any gender. I'm romantically pretty genderqueer so even thiugh Lee is rather soft and emotional (in the bedroom with Sakura) it will change in the next chapter. Everyone has their uos and down and I like variety and roller coaster romance. In comparison, I write Gai as quiet in bed and Lee has some of that but is mostly like his training self in Ninja Storm 4 and just typical koud, hot-blooded Lee in bed. I like him that way. All of my characters like sex differently so yeah, enjoy.
> 
> The next chapter is half written and contains "mostly straight" sex but ts always emotional and spicy when I write it. It will be a bit darker like this chapter.
> 
> To my dear troll: I decided to shorten this chapter as its almost a double. I do have a troll here and I know trolls tend to stalk fics and be repeat offenders, so Inam going to be the brat that I am and yeah, we are getting some hetero/queer sex and referenced m/m cus yeah, you troll me and I will happily write something involvin your slur. I am also a proud queerbesr snd happen to be in a heteromarriage so haha, bring on bisexual!Lee. I don't know how you like your apples but I like my straight boys comfortable with their sexuality. Aint nothin wrong with that mmmm batter up! Lee ets his butthole fingered cus of your homophobic slurs and apparently for added messure, I went off topic and he is banging Sai (just like in my LeeSai flick lol). Sure, w/e. TGIF!

Lee tries not to touch Sakura as he leans back and watches his deepest desires come to fruition. He does not deserve this. “I do not deserve this.” He feels this is a dishonour to her, to the idea of Sakura, his perfect flower. “This is a dishonour to-! Ahh!” She pinches the inside of his thigh above his knee and he growls, shoving his hands into his hair.to keep instinct from taking over. She is a friend, not an enemy. Friend or foe, as a taijutsu specialist, he is an expert in pain; serving pain, training til it hurts.  he enjoys  He pulls at his hair and grits his teeth.

 

She scrapes her teeth gently on the soft, white cotton of his traditional loincloth. He likes them instead of briefs as they give him the support he needs in spandex, not to mention they feel very manly. She gasps in surprise at what he hides beneath them when she slides the white cotton aside. His cheeks flush red. She sits up on his stomach and he stiffens, feeling how moist her sex is against his abs as they clench beneath her. Lee holds his breath as her breathing hitches. Sakura runs her palm down his length, eyes wide in wonder when she turns to face him. She bites her lip and climbs off of him. He stays very still and looks away before tugging the blanket out from under them. He thrusts the blanket towards her with one hand, obviously used to rejection, and smiles shyly as he waits for her to take it. 

 

Sakura giggles and the sound is music in his ears. He feels the blanket get tugged from his fingers and tries not to grasp it tighter, used to rejection but unwilling to let the moment go. He gasped in surprise, eyes wide as she trails kisses, flicking her tongue against his wrist playfully. He captures her gaze with his own, his eyes half lidded as he watches her through his long, fanned lashes. Sakura nuzzles his chin with her nose, lightly caressing the unfamiliar stubble on his chin. She kisses him softly on the lips and he waits obediently until she pulls away.

 

“Lee.” He watches her lips as she speaks softly, afraid to make eye contact. He chirps a squeal as she squeezes his length once more, her wicked smile returning as he meets her gaze. “Goddamn, Lee-kun! I don’t even know if I can work with this!” Her eyes dart up and down his incredible length. He remembers Sai having a similar reaction. Sai had pulled down Lee's pants after asking if he had a dick, as Sai used to do to every man he meets. When Lee had proclaimed he was the proud owner of a penis, Sai pulled down his anbu pants and marvelled at his cock in front of Konoha's gates for Izumo, Kotetsu and Tenten to see. 

 

What Lee lacks in looks Sakura notices he makes up for in endowment. She purrs, a rumble deep in her throat and he chuckles awkwardly, embarrassed; his old self showing through. He suddenly feels bold but his shyness prevails. “Does Sakura-chan like what she sees?” His eyes meet hers slowly after darting around the room and she nods with a hum. He smiles and leans back as her other hand slides up his chest.

“She does but Sakura-chan wants to see more.” She giggles and gives him a kiss again. He meets it and kisses her deeply, twisting his tongue to twine it with hers as he laps and prods with his tongue. She moans into his mouth as he purrs deeply. He is a good kisser, the best she has met and she is amazed as her body surrenders to his. She pulls away abruptly, unwilling to surrender control. “Lee, I am not afraid of you, or even doing this but,” her eyes dart away as he furrows his brows, “I’m a medical nin and I know men come in all shapes and sizes but, I’m, a little, well, scared. How do you hide this in spandex all the time!?”

“Traditional underwear?” Lee answers the rhetorical question with the obvious answer as usual. Sakura gives him a squeeze for emphasis and he chuckles awkwardly as his whole face turns red. He purses his lips together in that aggravated frown she is accustomed to seeing. He considers her words and believes she is teasing him. 

 

“Please, Sakura-san,” the honorific is back, “Do not patronize me.” He cannot take this from her, not right now, with his entire world torn apart and on a fast approaching landslide to complete destruction. He pushes her away gently by both shoulders, “I may not be handsome, or smart,” he stutters, “but, I assure you I will always protect you with my life. I-!” She squeezes him harder, applying some chakra to it. He yelps and she kisses him roughly before pulling away, leaving him in shock with his eyes closed.

“Lee, you overthink things. Do not make me gag you with your loincloth.” He frowns. She smiles in satisfaction as she has finally shut him up. “That's a good boy!” 

 

Sakura scruffs Lee’s hair with a smile, the way Kakashi always does it to his team and she licks his lips. He responds with a soft gasp, leaning forward but she pulls away, puts his hands in his lap and squeezes them between her own, “Sakura-san, wait! We,” he stutters slightly, “We both need some happiness, some comfort, I know this but I will not use you this way!” He interrupts her with an outburst, “You should save yourself for your most precious person, even if it is no longer Sasuke.” He whispers the last part, unable to look her in the eye.

“Lee!” She growls at him and he looks away. Now she is the one tilting his chin towards herself as she stares him down nose to nose and settles into his lap once again. She guides his rough, scarred hands to her hips and he awkwardly, slowly, brushes his fingers down them to her thighs and back up to her waist, more comfortable with settling them there. She waits until he can look her in the eye once more. “I don’t know what this is, between us,” her finger points between them and she pokes his nose. His eyes cross comically for a moment as he watches her finger flick his nose, “I don't know what either of us want, with all that is going on but please, let’s just enjoy this, together. Let’s not complicate this.” It takes a moment but he nods and she smiles before kissing him slowly. He makes to speak again and she frowns. She knows both Gai and Lee are known for speeches though Lee’s tend to be single lines instead of monologues. His words are always short, sweet, formal and full of meaning. She allows him to speak one last time.

“Sakura-chan, will not change her mind or regret this?” She shakes her head no. He kisses her nose and forehead, debating his words. He knows she is strong and a capable shinobi. 

 

They are both jounin. She knows he is a gentleman and chivalrous. He does not wish to dishonour her by implying he must be gentle because she is a woman and possibly a virgin as she implied. She is a strong, powerful shinobi, possibly stronger than himself. She has suffered so much already and he does not wish to belittle nor burden her. He chooses better words, instead of 'I will be gentle’ like a typical romantic lead. Instead, he says, “I will be responsible and considerate if you still choose to go through with this.” He looks down then back up again before quickly adding, “As you said we are friends and we should not complicate things with desire.”

“Lee?”

“Yes, Sakura-chan?” She smiles at him sweetly, then grabs his briefs and growls darkly.

“Hurry up and take these off! I don’t know how crazy traditional underwear works, even if it does make your ass look good!” She has seen Lee drunk in the street being chased by Team Guy enough times to know how great his ass looks in a mankini thong thingy.

 

“Yosh!!” He squeaks it obediently as his lips tremble in slight fear of her wrath. He has felt her punch before and never wishes to do so unprepared again. Sakura gets on her knees and Lee lifts his hips to unwrap his underwear, then tugs it off. He smiles softly, cheeks red as her eyes widen and pupils dilate. He settles into bed once.more and she pulls his loincloth from his hands where he guards it against his chest. She playfully scowls at him with a wink and turns around before turning around and resuming their previous position. 

 

Lee hesitantly rests his hands on the back of her thighs and slides them firmly to her ass as she licks up his shaft. He squirms slightly, pressing his neck to the pillow as she devours the head of his cock and playfully teases with her lips and tongue. His fingers slide to her folds as she presses her bottom back and hovers above his face. No rules have been discussed besides earning the right to touch her so he hesitates. Her ass wiggles as she takes him deeper in her mouth with a moan. He can see her rosy nipples hiding beneath her breasts, her chin between them, lips wrapped around him. He bites back a moan. Then he notices the tension in her stomach as she adjusts herself, her body going tense before she moans again and takes him deeper before her head begins to bob up and down. He tries to choke back another grunt and wants to keep his eyes open to admire the view but fails as his head falls back. 

 

Lee can smell her, wants to taste her and his body moves of its own free will, spreading her ass wide, admiring her soft, pink curls before sliding his tongue between them and moaning into her sex. His fingers grasp her ass as his tongue slides against and between her folds, his thumbs slide against the outside of both lips and firmly brush her perineum. His tongue finds her clitorus as he withdraws it and she throws her head back, the head of his long, thick cock still between her lips as she releases a deep, guttural moan combined with a squeal. He repeats the motions slowly with more firmness and she does it again, releasing him. His cock hits his abdomen with an audible slap as she falters, letting it slip from her lips. 

 

Her breasts are firm and supple against his thigh and one arm wraps around his calf for support. She sucks on the inside of his knee as he bends it to cradle her and she licks up his calf to his ankle. He loves the feel of her on his skin and her touches are driving him crazy. He smiles and purrs as he watches her come undone, no longer pleasuring his sweet cherry blossom as a distraction but in earnest as he resumes control. A taijutsu master must always be in control, always guides his opponent until they lead them to an opening. He moans softly in pleasure as she digs her nails into his skin, her sobs spurring him on as he breaches her with his fingers. He is not a patient man and he will never hold back his passion when it is consensual, when it is sought out and begged for. A sense of pride nearly overwhelms him as she falls to her side and he rolls them slightly so their heads rest on each others thighs. The only thing Lee loves more than a good fight and a hard workout is a good fuck. His own thoughts shock him. He can barely believe that he has fallen this low, has surrendered to his most primal urges. He has no time to feel guilt as she takes him in her hands, her sobs and sighs fueling the fire in his stomach as it twists and tighten within him. Lee will have her and he will make her want no one else be him. It has failed in the past, yes but this time he will make sure to keep her. This is more than casual fun to him, this is all of his heart and soul and passion being granted an audience with the goddess that has plagued and haunted his fantasies since he was thirteen. He will not fail this challenge. Her body tenses and relaxes several times; each time he laps at her juices, surprised at her sensitivity and lack of inhibition. Sakura is more beautiful and passionate than his wildest dreams could ever conjure and he is dying to be inside of her but patience is a virtue. He still tries to be a virtuous man when he can allow it. 

 

Sakura rolls off of him with her legs spread and limbs in disarray and he has held back, refusing to surrender to her intense and expert ministrations. She sobs at the loss of sensation and moans when he presses the length of his hard, lithe body to hers. She is overwhelmed  his touched, the caress of his  skilled tongue. She wonders why she had been such a bitch to him when younger, rejecting him in vanity. His touch will be her undoing, she can die happily in this moment without regrets of what could have been but she wants more, so much more of him. Sakura may want him more than physically after this and she hopes he will not reject her, that it is not too late. She has always known Lee is kind, gentle, loyal and resilient. Her adolescent brain never equated it to qualities she should have been seeking in Sasuke, qualities Sasuke never possessed. She hates herself for comparing them in this moment. Lee has never been cold to her like Sasuke. Lee has always been right here, trusting, supportive, beautiful on the inside with a body built from determination. She now notices how hard he is against her thighs and he respectfully adjusts himself so his cock is between their stomachs, away from her entrance. Even now, with her permission, he is patient and considerate, letting her lead, waiting for her to make a move fearful of fucking this up and it's all her fault why he is treating her so delicately, like a precious, fragile flower, to be looked upon and not touched until the petals fall before him in vain.

 

Sakura makes her decision and she thrusts up to throw Lee off balance. She grabs him with her strong thighs and wrestles him, knowing he will allow her to win. He allows her to dominate, to dictate his movements, he puts her pleasure and her desires before his own. Sakura is grateful he will be her first and she will not deny him his need. Lee's cock is pressed between her ass cheeks and she gasps as his length also brushes against the lips of her sex. He is so well endowed that she is actually a bit afraid that he may unintentionally hurt her but trusts him completely. Lee, unlike Sasuke, has never tried to hurt her, never made attempts to kill her. 

 

Lee purrs and smiles softly at her flushed skin and wide, wild green eyes, brushes her bangs out of her face. She can’t speak; there is so much to say and this moment is beyond her emotional capacity to interpret, so she weakly grasps for his hair and kisses him when he surrenders to her touch. It is, slow, sloppy, playful, as she drags her tongue over his lips without any strength left to go deeper. He chuckles and they both laugh as he wraps and arm around the small of her back and lets her rest. He is a good lover and she can't wait to enjoy more of him but is exhausted from the multiple orgasms she didn’t believe were possible. He has barely even begun and she is already spent. Sakura smiles with a soft sigh and drops her head to the bed. Lee draws circles over her breasts, his fingers touching her skin gently, admiring her beauty.He has done this to her and his heart swells with pride and a joy he has not felt since before the war. 

 

Sakura's mind is reeling as his fingers trace the curves of her body, discovering what she likes  and does not. He watches her expressions attentively. Her eyes are shining with unshed tears of both joy and sorrow. So much unhappiness lead to this moment of joy that would otherwise likely have never happened. Lee has always been an amazing person, the most loyal friend, has always kept respectfully at a distance while watching her back. She can’t believe she had denied herself so much joy for the bastard that is holding the entire village captive and subjecting her sensei, their senseis, to torture.

 

“Is Sakura-chan okay?” His voice is gentle and luls her back from the edge of bliss. Even now, he denies himself pleasure for her benefit and she grabs his cheeks and kisses him hard, pulling him down on top of her. She remembers where this was supposed to lead and she wants it, now!

“Lee, please tell me you came prepared.” His frown is back briefly as he looks at her lips and considers his words. So much is going on behind his eyes that she can’t read. He pauses, looking away for a moment before his gaze returns to her.

“This was not my intention last night, Sakura-chan. However,” he lifts off of her and reaches for his discarded weapons pouch, “It is, occasionally fortunate, that condoms and lubricant are distributed in standard anbu equipment.” A sad expression flickers over his features once more but she now understands. She does not wish to question it, or the reason for standard issued condoms and lube. She does not want to know. She is afraid to know. It does not need to be discussed between them anyways. They are consenting adults in a world that has gone to complete shit. All kunoichi know about seduction missions and most have some training in it, even if they would never admit to that knowledge. She chokes back a sob as Lee straightens and sits on the edge of the bed, clearly uncomfortable. She doesn't feel pity for him but does feel empathy. Sakura afraid he thinks she is belittling him again. He reaches a hand out to her to pull her up, offering, what, she doesn’t know. An end to this? No. No, she wants this. She wants him! No! They deserve happiness! She won’t let Sasuke deny this from Lee, not again, never again!

 

“No.” She says it so softly yet kicks away his hand, “End of discussion.” His body language tells her she is right, that he is retreating.

“Sakura.” No honorific and his voice is nearly a whisper as she eyes the red ink on his bicep, the mark of a killer, an assassin. He says nothing else, the guilt and remorse written in his posture. His erection wanes as he draws his arms around himself, his thoughts drawn inward and she sits up, presses her breasts to his back and wraps her knees around him. “You do not want me.Sakura-san, you will realize this is a mistake.” He insists. He points to his anbu brand, “I am not the boy you once knew. I am just one of the hokage’s dogs now.” He sobs, “I am not even loyal to my hokage, plotting to end his life. I am not a good person, I-! Sakura-san, you deserve better!”

“Lee-kun.” The honorific feels strange on her tongue but his tongue on hers is a very inviting.thought. Sakura cannot let him throw this away but she knows to give him some space, to concede for the sake of friendship. 

 

She presses a kiss to his cheek and slides her hand between his thighs, “You deserve happiness, Lee. We all deserve happiness.” She pauses her movement before touching him intimately and settles her other hand on his hip, fingers stroking gently. “Lee-koi,” this rolls more freely from her tongue and the sound shocks her as much as it startles Lee,” I will concede for the sake of friendship. If you want, this was just a genjutsu, by Sasuke, to mock you and none of this happened, but-!” she hesitates, nuzzles her nose against the crook of his neck, kisses his anbu tattoo, “I want you, Lee. As crazy as this sounds, even if it’s just once.” Her eyes well with tears and she swallows them down like a good kunoichi. The words don’t need to be spoken. They know any moment can always be the last. Neither wants to know what could have, should have, would have been, just to die anyways. “Please, let me return the happiness you've given me.” He inhales sharply and bites his lip. “Just this once, let me appreciate you. Just this once.” He does not fight it as she wraps her slender fingers around his girth. “Please, Lee.” She knows he has always wanted this, not under these kinds of circumstances. He wants Sakura to love him. As if she were a Yamanaka, reading his mind, she whispers in his ear as she curls her tongue and suckles the soft spot behind it, “Let me love you, for just one moment. I want to appreciate you for once.” 

 

Lee purrs and leans his head back against her shoulder, giving into her charms. He is fuller asare he could be in danger but he is fully wrapped around her finger, giving into her seduction tactics. Lee wonders if she was trained to do this, trained to seduce and kill while a target is blissfully exhausted and asleep. Maybe he’s just been jerking off to exactly this moment for just too damn long to tell when he is dreaming anymore. He could still be under her sleep jutsu, she could have used a poison under her nails, on her lips. His mind is racing as fight or flight makes his nerves stand on end but wherever she touches relaxes and is pure bliss. If he were to die now, he would be happy to have been deceived, to die in “Sakura’s” arms. Maybe this isn’t Sakura at all but a kunoichi sent to interrogate and kill him. It would explain why he is still alive. Sakura is begging him, begging to pleasure him. Never in his wildest dreams did he ever think this possible. He wants to enjoy this but he is haunted by living demons and the need to survive. He struggles against instinct and tries to fight the frown pursing his lips.

 

Sakura tugs him from under an arm and they scoot back so he can put his knees into a half lotus. She takes the condom from his hand and puts it on the nightstand, then lets some of the cool lubricant drop onto his shaft and balls. She likes the little gasps he makes and decides to do it to other parts of his body, enjoying the goosebumps rising on his flesh as his dark, rosy nipples harden on his tanned skin. She puts away the lubricant and slides her hands up and down the sparse curls on his chest, slides both hands slowly, firmly to his hips. She slides a hand between his thighs once more and takes hold, the other explores his body while her lips suckle his neck. “Please, let me enjoy you.” She smiles and flicks her tongue on his ear, adopts his formal pattern of speech as he tenses and relaxes against her hold. She holds him firmly across his belly and whispers in his ear, “Lee-kun is so sensitive here.”  He shivers from her touch and her voice. She knows exactly how to turn him on. He wonders again if this is a genjutsu, if the entire time he was sleeping was but a second in time. Sakura sighs in frustration when Lee stops responding, his eyes unfocused. She wonders if it’s her technique. She has been trained in massage so what’s wrong? “Lee.” She smiles and tilts his chin, places a kiss on it and admires his leaner jaw and high cheekbones, those dark lashes on lightly tanned skin. “Lee, I want you to teach me how you like it.” He can't help but sigh happily. His heart flutters and he wants to believe this is real. Why is she being so demure? He knows Sakura can be sweet but why is she so receptive to him? He wonders if it’s her medical training. Was he really that good at eating her out because he was willing to do it day and night until he gave her 5000 orgasms and if he failed he’d-! 

 

His long fingers and larger hands find hers and he guides her, surrendering to ignorant bliss. He wants to be a stupid, innocent boy again, he wants to be back to when the world was mostly good and he fell in love with a princess with pink hair. He was her knight who would never meet her standards. Sakura became his ninja way. The same way Gai wanted to be Kakashi’s equal and pushed himself harder, Lee has pushed himself, to protect the ones he loves with his bare hands, to be a worthy knight of his princess. In reality, how can he have the princess when he has not earned her love, her adoration, her kindness. Lee failed. Yet, if he had not failed to protect people he loves, comrades and friends, he would never have gotten the princess to notice him. The white queen has always chased the dark king, all over the chess board while the white knight watches from a distance. He defends her savagely but is rarely in her sight.

 

Lee purrs everytime he allows a sound to slip from his lips, surrendering as his mind drifts. He imagines Sakura as the princess and he the knight, celebrated for defeating the dark king, the white queen takes him from being simply a glorified pawn to be her king. Although he tries to hold the embarrassing sounds in, they slip out as he closes his eyes, inhales her scent, hears her breathing, feels her touch. He wants to taste her again but his hands are guiding her. He goes for it anyways, placing an open kiss with lots of tongue, flicking his tongue as he explores her mouth, dipping in shallowly. He sighs another long moan. Lee rarely lets himself enjoy sex as he is always afraid of ridicule. He is also afraid that anyone he beds may murder him in the act. He does not want to fight anymore. He is still willing to die, right now, in bliss. 

 

Sakura watches him in her mirror, offset in the corner of her room, without him noticing. At least she wants to believe he has not  noticed. She sees the tension leaving his expression, his body relaxing against her embrace as he allows himself to surf the building waves of pleasure. The position gives him the space he needs to relax and let go, not being forced to have her watch his face. Finally, Sakura hears Lee's breathing hitch and even out; he relaxes into her touch and allows her to continue on her own as his body goes numb and limp. She strokes a little harder and faster, enjoying his expressions, the sound Lee makes as he as he comes undone. He shivers when she cups his balls with her fingers. He murmurs something and she wonders if he is counting her strokes, using it as a mantra like when he trains to stay on control. He meditates, his sounds quieting and less frequent as be sighs blissfully, though the thrust of his hips betray him with each stroke. He pants as she teases him between her index and thumb and her finger bushes his perineum with the same hand. He whimpers as she does it again and his head rolls to the side. His overgrown, rounded bangs on his forehead is soaked with sweat as he gets quieter, his pants the only indication he is breathing as he stills his his and bites his lip. He turns his head away when she does it again and his his bangs slide away from his face so she can finally see his half lidded eyes. He is so beautiful in his surrender that it makes a fire warm in her chest, coils the arousal deep within her gut once more. She wants him so badly right now that it actually hurts but she wants him to enjoy it if it happens, not to hold back behind a veil of guilt. Maybe it won't happen today but she has a drawer of battery operated boyfriends on her “waiting for Sasuke” drawer in her nightstand to take care of that problem.

 

Lee's eyes flutter open and it nearly surprises her how harsh his voice sounds as he finally moans again. “There!” He whispers desperately, voice broken, then he adds with hesitation, guiding her hand politely, “Again, please.” He purses his lips and bites back a moan when her fingers slide under his balls and her index brushes his anus in a circle, dipping in slightly. “Yes!” He moans again and bites down a groan. His primal sounds pull at her arousal. She has never heard such sounds from Lee before, sounds that may at one time have disgusted her but are now guilty of possibly bringing her to orgasm as he pants in her ear, suckles her neck like he is a thirsty man in a desert and she is an ice sculpture. 

 

He nips her skin and she shivers, shuddering against him as she pants with him. He tenses and shivers again with a sob and his skin flushes all over. His suckling at her neck and breast becomes more intense but slower, most.sloppy as his tongue flicks her nipples. His grunts and sighs, remind her of everytime she has watched him train and she knows she has finally calmed his mind, claimed him for herself, despite the tension. He has finally allowed himself to enjoy this moment, to embrace the act. He is embarrassed.that this is what it takes to turn his mind off and wonders what she will think of his queerness. He stops kissing her as his body slides down into her lap, half relaxed and half shameful. He stutters, closes his mouth and opens it again, shivvers and moans before he tries once more as she slows her movements to allow him to recover and speak. 

 

“I, I am, quite comfortable with my, sexuality.” He says it shyly, between held back sobs and sighs. Sakura chuckles and strokes his cock with her free hand. As if his sexuality would even matter to her anymore. As far as she can tell, Lee is very into having consent that is 100% ok with Sakura. Fuck, look at how her last love interest turned out. Forget that Sasuke is gay, that’s not the point. Sasuke is a psychotic, friend-slaying, dictator. She definitely prefers her men more mentally stable and loyal. While Lee's green spandex makes her question the mental stability part, as does the anbu tattoo, Lee's loyalty is never something she has had to worry about. Sakura smiles at him and Lee purses his lips.

 

“I am open to your personal experimentation.” She says it clinically and he laughs. His hardness twitches with each brush of her fingers. Lee thinks he will keep his nurse fetish to himself. It's obvious at this point with how much time he spent in the hospital after the chunin exams. He pictures Sakura in a cute nurses uniform, administering him an aphrodisiac and-! 

 

Lee’s opens his eyes and reaches clumsily for the lube on the nightstand. Sakura is open to him right now and willing and fuck it, maybe he won't get to fuck her after this, after he reveals his kink to her but he wants to take the risk. He needs to be greedy for once. Lee lubricates his fingers well and his hand joins hers. He looks into her eyes as he slides his fingers over hers, lubricating them. He kisses her hard and deep, giving a new meaning to “oral” sex as they give and take in pleasure. He guides her movements over his anus, a finger joining hers as he presses it them inside. He moans into her mouth, deep and guttural as he loses his breath, asphyxiating himself a bit by holding his breath. Electricity sparkles in his vision as she kisses him just as passionately, the touch of his fingers sliding gently against hers and the tightness on her sensitive hands makes her gasp against him. 

 

Sakura pulls away with a string of saliva and pants as her pelvic floor contracts. He suckles her breasts as she increases the intensity, knowing where his prostate is as she is a medic. He loves the attention he is being granted and returns to moaning and sobbing as he takes himself on her fingers, grinding slowly up onto her palm on his cock. His eyes are clouded with lust, half lidded and full of a fire; his cheeks, flushed with embarrassment are now flushed with adrenaline. She knows very well only his fire burns for her. She looks into his eyes intensely in the mirror and he finds her gaze there like a well trained shinobi. Lee rolls his head a bit to look and smiles, positioning himself to give her a better view as he spreads his legs. He gasps at the sight of her fingers inside him and the lust in her eyes. He giggles and speaks between grunts as he grinds slowly and gives her a show. “Ughn. Sakura-san, is a, pervert!” She smiles wickedly and blushes. This only makes Lre laugh harder and blush. She clears her throat and puffs out her chest, using her best formal speaking voice.

“Well, I guess you can't be on Team Seven without some sort of kink.” 

 

Sakura tries not to think of Naruto’s Sexy Jutsu, Sai’s obsession with penises, Captain Yamato’s alleged forced male bonding at hot springs and shy tendencies, Kakashi’s dirty little book; they all remind her of Sasuke’s fucked up obsession with raping their sensei, her best friend. Her hand moves on its own as her mind wanders, keeping a steady, quick pace like she is cleaning medical equipment.

 

Lee holds in a cry. Although he can tell her mind is wandering he does enjoy the sensations. It gives him some time time to recover from her intentional strokes inside him and around his length. He puts a hand on both of her wrists, tries to still her movements on his cock and fails. He closes his eyes, his brows furrowed in concentration as he endures, waiting patiently for Sakura to notice him in the mirror as he raises from her lap. 

 

Sakura looks over to him and continues their conversation as if awkward minutes filled with nothing but the sounds of Lee’s moans and slick skin on skin has not passed. She slows her hand on him and he releases her wrists. She smiles warmly at him, “Of course you would be comfortable with your sexuality, Lee-kun.” His eyes flutter open and he turns his head to meet her gaze over his shoulder. His ears turn red. She rolls her eyes and slips a thumb in to join her index and middle finger, gently guiding it as she slows her movements, searching for his prostate again. Lee clamps his eyes shut again with a groan. Sakura’s clinical persona is strangely erotic. He would go to her any day for a prostate exam. It feels so fucking good when she strokes it.

“More.” He gasps as her finger brush his perineum. “Ahh, don’t don’t be so gentle, please!” He guides her fingers once more as she pulls them back allows her to breach him roughly. She starts pumping at a slow steady pace, her hands working in unison and his back arches, his hips grinding up into her palm with a will of its own. “Oh god!” He chokes out and blushes. He brings the back of his hand to his lips and bites the knuckle of his index finger, his body tenses as he holds himself back. “S-Sakura-!” His words are choked off and he shakes his head no. Sakura is enthralled by the perfect specimen of the human body before her. Her eyes are wide as if recording him with a sharingan. She is panting nearly as hard as Lee as she keeps that steady pace. Her lips are parted and she breathes with him, in and out as her fingers dance inside him  with the same rhythm. He can’t even think of the correct honorific as his body arches, his toes curl and he growls, denying himself release. 

 

Lee pants her name roughly and Sakura giggles. He is such a shoujo manga leading lady and she will happily let him be her pillow princess if he keeps making those sounds, if his body keeps moving that way in her lap. His muscles are so tight and defined. His back is perfectly steady and arched, his movements shaky but controlled as he makes sure to not hurt her as pleasure rises and falls within him. She can only imagine from touching him, knowing he is holding back, what it will feel like to have him this way between her thighs, enraptured and entranced by lust. She has never seen something more erotic in her life than her taijutsu user in the throws of passion. Lee throws himself into everything he does, overcoming every challenge. Why did she think this wouldn't carry over into his lovelife. She is happily at how deliciously  sensitive he is and strokes his nipples. She gives them a pinch and Lee’s eyes go wide, his abs crunch and he sits up slightly, trying to adjust her depth, not knowing if he should press himself down onto her fingers or to retreat and stop himself from coming so he can take her, now! 

 

“Ahh! Sakura, I-! I'm sorry, nyah!” His body stiffens, “I am being, uhn, greedy!” Lee’s eyes tear up and her gaze is too much for him to bear, the cork on his imaginary emotional bottle coming loose. He tries to slow his breathing but his mind is nearly too far gone to stop his actions. He wants to beg her to stop but it feels too good to be here in her arms. Lee fears that if she stops now, he will take her and he will break his promise to be responsible and considerate. So throws his head back and stares at a spider on her ceiling. He thinks it’s a spider but his eyes are too blurry to register it. Sakura coos and sighs with him as she takes some of the pressure off of his cock, allows her strokes slow. It only seems to make him writhe and squirm more as he tries not to let his strength harm her. His body relaxes as she lets him fall down from his arousal once more and he slides a hand into her hair, sits up straighter in her lap and lifts up a bit to try to get this over with. She can see him trying to rebottle his emotions, shutting himself down as he closes his eyes and his brows furrow. Sakura steadies herself. She lets go of his cock and strokes the small of his back and up to his shoulders, peppers everything she can reach with kisses. She worries about what Lee is thinking. Lee slides her remaining, slender fingers inside himself and begs for her to go harder again,praises how she strokes and claws her fingers. He is grunting and groaning into it and Sakura shifts their weight. Lee slides a hand gently into her hair and kisses her over his shoulder, his body fully exposed to her in the mirror. He focuses on Sakura, slides a flexible arm behind his back and finds her pussy dripping against his fingers, soaking against his lower back. They grind together in unison as their sounds are like echos of eachother. Sakura is enjoying this side of Lee, his humility and vulnerability. She admires his ability to multitask, loves the way his body feels against hers with that perfect muscle control as she rides the movements of his hips. Maybe he really is a genius after all. She wonders again why she had never dated him before!

 

“Ah, fuck!” He shudders and slides his fingers out of her to suck them, loving the taste of her juices. She cums from the loss of  sensation as he slides his two fingers from her abruptly. Lee is a gentleman and never swears yet his vulgarity turns her on that much more. Sakura feels bold and empowered that she can do this to him. Lee is one of the strongest shinobi in the village, even without chakra and yet he is coming undone at her fingertips. She licks his lips, tasting herself on his fingers, in her mouth. She loves the way he tastes.

 

As Lee's mind catches up once more, he remembers some bullshit Sai had said to him in bed when Lee was first experimenting, when he joined anbu right after the war. Sai had said, “Anyone that idolizes a man in green spandex and does so himself, cloning his master's image, has to be confident with their sexuality.” Sai smiled and laughed as he worked his fingers in Lee, chakra cuffs strapping Lee to the steel table. Lee considered that session emotional conditioning, a test of humility. Perhaps he should not have taken his partner as a lover. Lee broke the shackles with pure strength and punched Sai for issuing a challenge, questioning his sexuality, while he was most fragile and insecure. This is part of interrogation training, humiliation. Lee already knows humiliation well but also knows humility. He thinks this is personal with Sai. He knows Sai hates training unwilling recruits but wants them to be train well, to not die, to not be tortured and killed for failing their hokage. Sai does not want to be the one to kill failures. Lee knows that what Sai does in training will never be as cruel as being captured by the enemy. He tried to tell himself that maybe Sai just doesn’t know better with all of his emotional barriers back in place, after Lee helped him release them during the war. Now, Sai had been the one to train Lee how to work efficiently while his emotions are in lockdown. He wants to forgive Sai for taking him as a lover and then mocking him during training but he just can’t take that shit anymore. He never loved him anyways. Sai was his confidant, his shoulder to cry on. Lee wonders if this thing with Sakura is a mistake, if Sai was the one sent to poison her, if he did it out of spite.

 

Lee’s mind drifts back to reality and he has no idea how long he's been gone. Sakura has stopped her movements. He feels how Sakura is bracing herself with chakra, trying to maximize his comfort and pleasure as he forces himself on her fingers. He stops, embarrassed as he looks around her room, disoriented. He is a taijutsu master and the pain just spurs him on. He bites his lip as he feels her cakra flow through him, healing the scratches from her nails inside of him. 

“I'm sorry, Lee. I tried to pull out but you may have gotten hurt if I did.” Lee enjoys pain but does not wish to hurt Sakur or scare her away. He eases up and apologizes, asks her if she wants to stop. Sakura shakes her head with enthusiasm and allows him to recover his composure. Lee sits on the bed, hands awkwardly covering his erection while Sakura heals the inflammation in her wrist. When she is done she declares it happily and pats her lap. Lee is grateful that Sakura is so understanding and wonders where the violent woman within her that fought Ino has gone. They relax back into their position, laying back on the bed sith Lee sprawled in her arms once more. This time, he is hesitant in his movements when she covers him in slow kisses. He will allow himself one more attempt at this, thinking up punishments again. As a teen, self-imposed rules kept him focused and hardened his body with training but as an adult, training under Sai, with Sai as a non-exclusive lover, fuck buddy if you will, he finds that he enjoys punishment on a much deeper level. He wants Sakura to punish him and he hums when she playfully slaps his ass.

 

Lee's body is the perfect weapon for covert missions. He is in control of pain at all times, especially as a master of up to six of the eight gates. In fact, he has learned to enjoy it’s rush of endorphins. He uses it in battle, to fight through the pain. He remembers that Sakura trained under Tsunade and she is as cruel and vigilant in training as Gai. Lee forgets that normal people don't enjoy pain like him, that he may be a bit of a freak. He is glad that Sakura is strong enough to withstand him when his mind is absent, glad she does not hate him for being lost in his own head; he noticed she does it as well.

 

Sakura gasps as she watches his movements, as he watches her. His muscles flex as his body moves in a low, seductive rhythm, laying on his side facing her mirror. He wants to give her a show. He smiles, chuckling  sweetly in contrast to his behaviour. Sakura’s eyes turn wild again as she grabs the bottle of lube from where she stashed it under her pillow. She rubs the gel between her fingers. When she presses her fingers inside of him again and pumps them, finding his prostate easier in this position, she presses three in once more and catches him off guard. Lee squeals, his body shaking as it tenses. The sound is embarrassing to his own ears and tries to hold his position, to not fall on her arm and break her wrist. She immediately picks up the pace and he laughs when she strikes him there again. She smiles and laughs with him, pulls him down to the bed and repositions him so they are on their side.

 

“Ughhhhhh, don’t!” He moans as he slumps bonelessly in her arms. “Please, no more!” He begs weakly. She slides her clean hand over his thigh, squeezes his cock and lets him gasp and sob before she moves her fingers around his cock. She slides it to the neck of his cock and grips his foreskin lightly. He doesn't complain as she twists her grip and flicks her wrist with a squeeze expertly. He sucks in a sharp breath and pants as she repeats the motion in quick succession. He grabs her wrist with his index and thumb firmly but tries not to hurt her as he shivers, “I-! Stop! I will not last if you continue.” He looks at her pleadingly, eyes wide in fear and embarrassment and Sakura does not break eye contact. 

 

Lee is actually crying now as Sakura kisses his forehead delicately and shuts him up with a deep, flicking kiss. She knows he will proclaim his punishment again and that is going to kill her lady-boner faster than his butt-stuff confession ever could.  He can’t even close his mouth as  he pants for air and is drooling slightly as he fights to stay in control. Sakura slides another finger into him, this time to the base and begins to scissor. Lee cries out and releases his grip against his will. He wanted her to throw him over the edge and despite all the psychological trauma and distractions between them, she might actually do it. If he did not release her wrist, he knows he’d have broken every delicate bone in it, grinding it to powder. He begins to black out, mind going pleasantly blank as he fades in and out of consciousness. His balls curl tightly and the muscles in his abs and butt cramp painfully, only adding to his release. Pain and pleasure meet an edge as her hands work in unison. If he does not allow himself to cum now he is afraid he will die, a very, very happy man! Then he feels something as a green light glows the darkened room, the blinds are still shut and it is brighter than the sun peeking between the gaps in the curtains. His mind goes pleasantly blank and he does not recognize his own voice as it echoes back to him, dances all around him from the walls.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for the long note but I felt it necessary. I want to finish this in 2 more chapters. It may be one though.


	3. Closer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I kinda regressed to my agsty, d/s, bdsm self and so, Lee joins the church of goddest Sakura and accepts a baptism by fire and ice through orgasm denial.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hardcore sex ensues.The title is from NiN's song of the same name. I thought the song suited it when I hit the end of the fic.
> 
> So much hardcore, emoional, angsty sex; beautiful, crazy sex, is in this fic. 
> 
> Just holy shit. Did I actually write this? Yes, yes I did and I am proud!

Lee opens his eyes and it's still early morning. Sakura's blinds are still closed; light is beginning to seep in from around her curtains, telling Lee the sun has just risen. Her clock on the nightstand says its only been a few  minutes from the last time he remembers looking at it. Sakura’s fingers glow in the morning lowlight over his hips and abdomen and Lee relaxes in bliss. He stretches out in her bed, body buzzing win pleasure as her chakra flows through him. Come to think of it, he felt strange when he came; he has a blissful high but he does not feel released. His balls ache and he feels a tiny electrical current from his perineum to his navel.  He gasps as he comes to and looks up at the pink locks of hair tickling his forehead, the green eyes that tell him maybe, just maybe, this is not a dream. He squeals and tumbles out of her lap onto the floor. 

 

Sakura holds back a giggle as Lee goes from agile taijutsu master to awkward social reject once more, unsure of how to get to his feet and preserve his dignity as he fell on his balls. He gasps at Sakura’s still naked form while she strikes a nonchalant pose and blows him a sassy kiss. His eyes fly automatically to his crotch and his body can’t decide if to cum again or to wet himself! 

 

“Ahh-ha! Sakura-san!” He squeaks, “Um, please, excuse me!” He tries to rush out of her room and ends up locking himself in the closet. Sakura chuckles when the door slams shut but then sighs as she hears a sob. If shit wasn’t hitting the fan outside these walls, they would make a cute pair in a romantic comedy.

 

“Hey, Lee?” She knocks gently and leans against the door, “It's okay. I, I’m sorry I didn’t listen! I won't do that again, I promise! Please come out.” No response. She tries to get clinical but is mindful still of how much Sasuke used to hate her supportive ramblings. She bites her lip and swallows hard. “There is no reason to be embarrassed.” She pauses, “It's not premature ejaculation when you last that long. When the prostate is overstimulated it’s harder for men to…” She trails off. This is not helping. Definitely not. After a moment, Lee opens the door enough to fit his wrist and puts a hand out.

 

“My pants,” he amends with a swallow, “please.” Sakura rolls her eyes and grabs them. She pulls the door open forcefully and throws them at his head before slamming the door shut. She hears several items fall off the shelf as his head hits it and stifles a laugh at his grunts and groans. Minutes pass but Lee doesn't come out. When he hears her toilet flush, he pokes his head out the door and shuts it again. Sakura knocks and opens the door, pointing to another door in her room. “Bathroom is that way.” She grumbles something that sounds like, “Please don't tell me you peed in my closet.” He squeaks.

“Sakura-san! I would never-!” His eyes are popping out of his head and he blushes from head to toe. He does not want to admit he just felt vulnerable. He also lost his personal challenge. If she still  wants him, he will make it up and work  four times as bars to please her. Her giggle, while playful and soothing, is punishment enough to his ego. He makes a tiny whimper and she respectfully does not make eye contact. She hands him a towel when he comes out. Lee is flushed from head to toe again as he tiptoes to her bathroom. 

 

“Hey.” Sakura knocks a minute after he flushes, “I get it, you need some space.” She waits for a response. None comes. She tries again, “I can wait but please don’t overthink things, Lee.” She misses his body heat, his presence, the sense of security she has now that she knows he is in the village, alive and well. He stifles a whimper and they both wonder how the hell Lee is in anbu. She singsongs as she puts on a bathrobe and sits on her bed with a sigh, “Still friends, right?” Lee stiffens as he looks at himself in the mirror.

“Mm. Yosh!!” 

 

Lee smiles with a thumbs up and she can hear it in his voice but can't see it. She knows he is faking his confidence. It's the same thing Gai-sensei does when he is uncomfortable. “May I use your shower, Sakura-s-” She raises an eyebrow and he can feel her flare of killing-intent as she glared daggers through the wall. He pauses before finishing, “-chan?” Sakura grumbles incoherently through the door. He assumes it is a yes but knows better as an adult not to question Sakura. She does not like to repeat herself.

 

Lee washes in her shower quickly, removing all traces of lubricant in those crazy hard to reach spots only someone as flexible as Lee can get. He looks down and notices a glowing green seal that tingles. He kind of noticed it in the closet but the light is so faint he barely looked in his embarrassed state. It winds around his cock and his balls, the kanji intricate and tiny. He sighs in relief. Sakura has used some sort of seal on him. He wonders if its an ownership brand. It's strange that seeing it, feeling it, gives him a sense of calm and not panicked at a non-consensual on his privates. He thinks it is to hold him from release, allowing him pleasure but denying him relief from the pressure. Orgasm denial. He shivers. How erotic. ‘Sakura-s, er, -chan is so so sexy. So considerate.’ He worships the ground she walks on. This must mean she still wants him or she would not have left a mark, he hopes. If it was not a seal to stop him from cumming, Lee would relieve himself in the shower right now!

 

Lee notices the brand new toothbrush and a pack of pink, ladies, 4-bladed razors in a package and decides she must be a courteous host. He wonders if other men have been here and if he is mistaken of her sexual status. He looks in the mirror and takes in his messy, overgrown hair and the scars all over his arms and one leg. His self esteem plummets further; he wonders why she even allowed him into her room. He knows that if he lied about this attempt on her life, Sakura, would fucking kill him! With a capital f! He frowns. She could not kill Sasuke so be supposes she would let something like that go, maybe. The situation is hypothetical anyways as he overthinks it. Someone really was assigned to poison her. He chuckles darkly to himself. Even if Sakura was poisoned, she is a poisons expert and likely would have solved her own delema. He still would not have enjoyed seeing her suffer its lasting effects. He’d rather have drank it himself to prove a point of his need to protect her!

 

His mind catches up to what she said about him needing a moment. He slaps his cheeks as he washes his face and decides to go back to the shower and wash his hair after he shaves the stubble from his face. As he steps out and runs the towel through his hair, he does not hear the door open. He stiffens at her touch as her fingers slide over his abdomen and around his waist. He thinks that maybe does not have the experience, is not old enough to know not to suddenly touch an anbu jounin. She should have learned from Kakashi or Tsunade. Maybe she does know better though, maybe it's why she doesn't hesitate. Her fingers feel electric on his skin and he wants to feel more of her touch. Instead, she brushes past him and takes the towel, reaches for her brush and comb on the shelf above the toilet. 

 

Lee flushes again, feeling very exposed as she ties the towel around his waist and hugs him from behind. She plunks a smaller towel on his head from behind her bathroom door. Sakura breathes in his scent, mixed with her wintergreen shampoo from head to toe and is intoxicated by it, by him. She gives his balls and his ass a squeeze, eliciting a squeak. It warms her as he breathes him in, still high off post-orgasmic bliss despite the awkward moments they’ve had so far. She Gently guides him sit down on the toilet seat.

 

“Here, let me cut your hair, Lee. I have never known you to look like an old mop.” He chuckles dryly without humour. He holds his tongue. They smile sadly at each other. Yes, they both know Kakashi is being used right now as a dirty, old mop for a filthy young man. While they are busy playing domestic sweethearts.

 

Sakura beams a smile and Lee plasters one on as well, now an easy reflex for them both. Every team seems to have something in common and Team Sevens theme is their ability to fake a smile through anything. Lee is an honorary member, has completed so many missions with them in place of Sasuke, while Tenten was learning sealing techniques and Neji was busy training Hinata and leading missions as a jounin. Lee wonders if he is just a replacement for Sasuke now as well.

 

Lee watches her work with his usual intensity. He knows Sakura’s smile well. This is the one she wore when Sasuke left the village, when Naruto left for nearly three years to train. It’s a sad, lonely smile under all the false layer. It's the same one she puts on whenever she is asked about Sasuke, her team, when Sai asked if she was happy that Sasuke was back, only for Sasuke to betray them, again, eternally.

 

She expertly cuts his hair with the hands of a practiced surgeon for she is one and yet she knows she could not use these same trained hands to kill Sasuke; to save Naruto. Right now they still fail to protect her sensei, all of her sensei and perhaps these skilled hands shall fail her new lover when she needs to protect him or needs to save his life. 

 

“Sakura-chan.” He takes the scissors gently from her shaking hands and looks at her in the foggy bathroom mirror. “Don’t-” Don’t what? He doesn't know what to say. He is an expert at mentally berating himself and therefore a hypocrite if he tries to comfort her. He rises just as slowly instead and cups her hands against his cheeks with his own, leans his forehead against hers and looks her deeply in the eyes. What can he say to comfort her? ‘Don’t blame yourself? There is still hope?’ ‘I’m sorry for being a insufficient distraction for your grief’ is the only truth can come up with so he bites his tongue. The rest of his thoughts are lies he tells to himself every moment since he bowed to his ‘hokage.’ What comes out of their mouths is something they both want to forget as they close their eyes. 

 

They both say together, “I should have drank the tea.”

 

They open their eyes and chuckle, sad but bittersweet and Lee speaks first. “No, Sakura-san.” He corrects himself, “Sakura-chan, never say such a thing.,” Hypocrite. “It would not save our sensei and it would only leave our souls restless,” he swallows hard, “Haunted.” They think of their lost teammates respectively. He thinks of Neji, who once hated his clan, hated his village for doing nothing against injustices in the Hyuuga clan, done for the sake of protecting clan and village. She thinks of Naruto, whom was orphaned protecting the village and burdened with the oppression of having a demon inside of himself. What if one of them had been like Sasuke? Even Kakashi had the opportunity to defect, to place the village in the wrong hands when he was their age. 

 

Sakura only nods and Lee kisses her forehead, pulls her tightly against himself. “If I drank the poison,” he shakes his head, admitting the truth, “because I know, I could have stolen it, rather than dropping it, I could not be here to protect you.” He steps back and she clutches at him, her nails desperately scratching his skin in the absence of his clothes and he realizes, she needs him as much as he has always needed her. She wipes a tear from his cheek as he bottles his emotions, holds back, like Sai taught him, like a good shinobi. He will not dishonour the sacrifices of the dead by reminiscing on the fact he'd rather walk among them than the living. He knows she is the only one who can survive the gates. 

 

Lee tilts his chin up in determination and gives her his winning smile and thumbs up as she presses her cheek against his chest, listens to his heartbeat though she cannot see it, he does it anyways. “I will help you become stronger, my sweet Sakura-chan.” She tries not to giggle at his cheesy lines but they both smile as she does it anyways and looks up at him. He continues as he tilts her chin up, using his shouko lead persona. “You shall become my cherry tree, not the blossoms; never dying once you bloom,” He hugs her tight again, “and I shall be your roots.” 

 

Silences stretches between them as he  blushes. He does not kiss her and she gets tired of waiting for him to make a move. She takes the towel slowly and tugs it free from his hips, lets it pool on the floor. She slips her robe off her shoulders, lets both items gather with his trimmed locks on the floor beneath their feet, suddenly unconcerned about the mess for once. She waits for the question now with anticipation. Lee tilts his head as his nose brushes hers. “Will you allow me this blessing?” She blinks for a moment and her mind remembers his oath, to train her, to support her, to protect her.

“Yes.” She sighs softly. Of course she will! Not the question she wanted to hear but she accepts it as she grinds her hip against his, earning a small grunt, “You have always been my roots, Lee.” 

 

Lee smiles softly and pauses, knowing he is keeping her in suspense after she clearly cannot wait to have him again but once more he is afraid of rejection. Sakura grinds against him and squeezes his toned, hard but supple ass once more, scratching her nails gently against his tailbone, earning a shiver. He always wants to shout ‘marry me’ instead of 'please go out with me’ but settles for subtly. They no longer live in a world where that matters to anyone.Maybe it never mattered. He finally asks her permission.

“May I kiss you, Sakura-chan?” 

 

Before Lee can finish asking, her lips are on his and she is soon hoisting herself onto his hips, her fingers firmly pressing into his shoulders until as he supports her by her thighs and she slides her hands around his neck. He can’t think as his body responds to hers, her body guiding his movements like she is a taijutsu master herself. He stumbles against the door frame. “Mmm…” She purrs into his kiss and kicks off the other side of the frame, sending them tumbling towards her unmade bed. She grinds into him, keeping him off balance. She secretly likes to see Lee nervous but confident. That’s how she has always remember  him. He is ok with the unspoken arrangement for the most part.

 

They tumble to the bed, as gracefully as the taijutsu master can with an erection between his thighs and his object of desire all over him, his head swimming with arousal. He grunts as he spins them so he takes the fall and she lands on his stomach, narrowly missing his balls with her knee. He is suddenly grateful he is a taijustu master and she a kunoichi. She singsongs and pokes him on the nose before giving him a lick from.his nose to his forehead and he gasps at her erortic tone, “You have my permission to do more than that, Lee-kun.” She bites his lip gently and pokes him in the chest as she pulls away with a smile, “So you better.” 

 

Lee gulps at the threat and accepts her challenge with a small raise of his brows. His libido is back 1000 fold and he frowns, pursing his lips, biting their insides. He shivers, holding back and an argument flies through his head. His mantras about patience and discipline. He really wants to run 500 laps around the village and come back before he hurts her, reminding himself she is a virgin. She grinds her bare sex against his own and his voice is ragged as he grits his teeth, “Sakura-chan, please. I am at the edge of control.” He makes an expression of pain and rolls her off of his lap onto the bed, careful not to drop her as she clings to him definitely, “Fuck, please! Give me a moment!” She whimpers and her thighs flex at his curse. She likes seeing Lee lose control more than she likes breathing air. He whimpers and adjusts himself, tries to pull back. She allows it but runs her hands up and down his chest, pausing to run his nipples through her fingers, lightly stroking circles with her fingertips between strokes and light scratches. He gives her the benefit of doubt as he hangs his head and tries to.clear his mind. She does not know the man he has become.  

 

Lee does not want his lust to become likes Sasuke’s. Sakura senses a change in him and sits up a bit, ready to comfort and console, to stroke his ego, to remind him he is not their common enemy. He shakes his head, opens his eyes to stare into hers with a determined frown and half lidded eyes. He is ready. He has wanted this for so long and he will not allow himself to fuck it up. As he reaches for the condom without breaking eye contact, he is ever grateful for her chakra sealing technique. He does not let his determination falter but knows anxiety is not enough to hold him back. It was not enough his first time with a woman either. 

 

Lee guides her higher onto the bed, his supporting the small of her back. They lay across the double bed sideways and his knees are at the edge. He takes her pillow and tucks it, slowly repositioning her bottom over it, the fold at the crease of her thighs. He has read excessively about preparations and comfort for virgin sex in his youth, always wanting to be extra gentle. He brushes his nose to hers as they exchange breaths and kisses her softly before pulling back to access her willingness and readiness. Sakura's thighs are trembling and her breath is hitched but controlled. She is a shinobi and knows how to control her adrenaline. She is a medical nin and can do it that much better. He reads her body as an expert in judging the status of his opponent and knows she is still exhausted from her spar with their sensei the previous day. She is nervous but calms her body anyways. He can smell traces of sweat and her arousal and it’s intoxicating that she is worked up just for him. 

 

Lee kisses her again, small, form, slow kisses over her face, her cheeks, her jaw. He reminds himself again she is not a delicate flower and applies pressure as he kisses her jaw and neck. His fingers trail under the backs of her thighs until she parts them slightly. He nuzzles the outsides of her breasts and she arches her back, parting her thighs slightly. He slides down the edge of the bed onto his knees as he.trails his tongue, suckiling his skin to her navel as her breath hitched and body tenses and relaxes beneath him. 

 

Sakura watches Lee intensely. His lashes fan over his cheeks like a doll, his eyes lightly shut as he softly coos and sighs, tasting her. She never saw Lee as erotic, beautiful, powerful as she sees him now. He flicks his tongue over the top of her bellybutton and dips it inside. She never knew her body was so sensitive, so responsive to touch but he seems very experienced. She lets the thoughts go as a surge of jealousy, the type normally directed at Ino in her childhood, flows through her. It only spurs her arousal on as his tongue darks between her curls and he slides to the floor between her knees.

 

Sakura gasps, long and slow. His long licks are intense. His eyes fluttered open slowly and he watches her, his lips disappearing beneath her mound. She tries to sit up, propped on her elbows but collapses, inhaling another long whimper. She tries to swallow her noises and fails as her eyes meet his again. He flicks his tongue, sharp.and accurate over the sides of her clitorus and gives it a suck between his lips. He begins to lap at her like a madman, sighing and panting softly, moaning like she is the best meal he has ever had the pleasure of enjoying. Her head rolls back, eyes closing as more of those sounds come out. He chuckles softly, letting her take a few breaths of air before he licks beside her entrance, then sucks on each other her lips slowly. 

 

Lee slides a hand over her stomach, applying light pressure as his other arm scoops up her hip. He suddenly tugs her towards his face with a soft grunt, throws his thigh over his shoulder and gets back to work. Her brows raise in shock and she has barely any air in her longs before another long, high pitched moan escaped her lips. She tastes sweet and salty like watered down honey and trail mix. He tries to control his excitement as she takes a  deep breath, her body tensing and she cums for him. 

 

Sakura is too maddened to care about embarrassment, cannot even recognize her own, distant voice as it echoes back to her from the walls. He suckles her juices, surprised at how wet she is, how uninhibited she becomes beneath his touch. He chuckles again after  she comes down from her high and licks firmly from her perineum to her belly button with another groan of pleasure. His breath tickles and entices her, cool in contrast to his warm tongue on her skin and he smiles at her when she groans in frustration. He trailed his fingers slowly on her stomach and chuckles with a smug grin.

 

“Lee.” She slaps his shoulder playfully. Her voice is a whimper and his cock twitches and stiffen at her need, “Please! Just do it!” Her hand scrambles and it takes three weak attempts to find his fingers. She threads her own through them, pulls him forward with her other hand on his wrist and all but folds herself in half to kiss him hard. He moans into the kiss, releases her grip to adjust the pillow to the edge of the bed where he is kneeling and repositions her hips. 

 

Sakura gasps as his hard cock brushes her sensitive ass cheeks and he pulls back, straightening to reach the condom beside them on the bed. She watches him prepare himself. He strokes his length with some lubricant and applies some inside the condom, gives her a bit of a show as he flexes all his smooth, toned muscles. She bites her lip with a whimper, sitting up slightly, her thighs rubbing together. She feels exposed and vulnerable but she wants him so badly right now she doesn’t care! The wait is agonizing. 

 

Lee bites off a couple groans as the condom tightly engulfs his length. It's barely adequate and Sakura's eyes widen slightly again. He closes his eyes as he rubs lubricant up and down his shaft, a little extra to the head. Sakura has forgotten how well endowed Lee is and a small whimper escapes her lips. Her pupils dilate in excitement even as her stomach and thighs quiver with slight fear.

 

Lee sighs in relief and climbs onto the edge of the bed with his knees again, one foot on the floor. He smiles softly at her as her eyes flicker between his face and his length trailing over her stomach, his abs flexing and tightening with each movement. 

 

“Sakura-chan.” He tilts his forehead towards hers and kisses her forehead gently before pulling back enough for her to focus on his face. He smiles softly and waits for her to do the same. “I will prepare you now. I do not wish to hurt you.” He gives her a chaste kiss and lays closer to her body, propping himself on his elbow as he places the bottle of lubricant in her hand. He presents his hand and it takes her mind a moment to catch up when he says please. She squirts a bit and he says good. Then before her mind can keep up again, his fingers are working inside her, caressing her folds. He moans deliciously and smiles softly, making eye contact again as he breaches her with his fingers. She gasps as he curls them, “Sakura-chan. You are well prepared from your precious plateau.” She tightens around his fingers and he gasps softly before pulling them back, “Therefore, may I-?” She cuts him off with a sob and a desperate cry of frustration.

“Lee, will you please just fuck me already!?” He stiffens with a yelp and his eyebrows hit the ceiling. Lee scrambles to straighten himself into position with a chirp. 

“Yosh!!” 

 

Lee warms more lubricant between his fingers, just to be safe before capping the bottle and returning it to the nightstand. He uses his clean hand to make sure the pillow and her hips are angled well and he braces himself on his forearm beside her. He takes a deep breath as he balances his weight between his right foot on the floor and his left knee and forearms, then hovers above her, kisses her deeply before sliding back a bit to enter. He closes his eyes with his brows furrowed in concentration and pulls back from the kiss, eyes half-pleading for her to change her mind and half-begging her to never ask him to stop. He grasps himself firmly with his right hand and brushes himself against her labia, kissing her gently behind the ear.

“I, I will go as slowly as I can.” He whispers in her ear, awkwardly adding, ”Here I go.”

 

She gasps at his hardness against her. As he pushes forward gently, holding in a groan at her tightness, Sakura wraps her hand around his right bicep with a gasp, her fingers digging in slightly. Lee suckles the spot behind her ear that makes her moan and actually presses in the head, making her whimper as he nips her gently to distract her and her free hand grasps his shoulder.

 

“Oh my god!” Sakura gasps as electricity travels to her stomach, her thighs shaking. It doesn’t hurt like she thought it would but the feeling is more intense than she imagined. Her mind races as her hand slips to his chest and she paws at his flesh. He pulls back to watch her expression with half lidded eyes and tries to distract himself from his need to claim her. 

 

Sakura whimpers, her breath shuddering, when he pushes again and her head falls back to the mattress. Her eyes fluttered open and he smiles softly, eyes with concern. Her hand falls to the mattress as he lets her adjust, her nails still digging into his bicep. He smiles softly when she smiles up at him. Neither of them can believe this is happening. He has waited so long to have her this way, to be in her life any way possible. She has finally allowed herself to let go from her standards, morals and fantasies. 

 

“Are you already, Sakura-chan?” Lee smiles, trying not to be too smug about it and Sakura slides her hand into her hair. It pulls softly at her short pink locks. Lees breathing is haggard as he holds his position, counts the seconds that tick by as he disciplines himself not to give in. She cries out mournfully and gasps for breath, a light sheet forming between her breasts and on her forehead. It feels good but strange the fullness and emotion claiming her.

 

“Ahh,” she arches her back experimentally and her hips shift uncomfortably, “Is it, is it all the way in?” Her eyes are unfocused and he chuckles, lifting his head a little more. Is that a challenge or sweet innocence on the verge of being shattered. His old self wants to preserve that innocence but the new cynic within him cannot wait to break her as his lust begins to boil over the edge of control. 

 

Lee chuckles softly and kisses her chin, “No, Sakura-chan. It is not.” He suckles her chin and jaw, then scraps his teeth gently along them to her neck. He locks the shell of her ear and she shivers as he lays his stomach on hers, “Do you still want me to be full inside of you, cherry tree.” 

 

She shivers and her hand goes from her hair to the back of his head. She grasps his drying locks of now once again silky, shiny hair and she kisses him hard, wraps her left thigh over his left one. She hooks and ankle behind his knee while he is distracted and pulls him to her. He fumbles but counters her movement, afraid to hurt her but his length still breaches her depth and she gasps. 

 

“Nyaaaahhhhhh!!!!” She cries out and he pants loudly, whimpering at the sudden tightness strangling him. He loses control as he thrusts inside her to the hilt and she cries out breathlessly unable to recover. He kisses her again and she breaks the kiss, gasps for air. She digs her fingers into him and he pulls back against her grip to make sure she is ok.

“Sakura-san! Did I-? Are, are you injured?” She is panting and gasping, pressing her shoulders into the mattress and her hips against his as her back arches beautifully against the angle of the pillow.

“Move!” She pants, tightening her thighs around him, “Now!” He barely recognizes her voice as they search each other’s expressions. She slaps his bicep over his anbu tattoo where her nails have drawn a scratch of blood.

 

“Hai!” Lee nods his head and grinds his hips, rutting against her as he begins to sweat and pant, holding back a whimper. She whines softly when he pulls back and gasps as his hips snap forward with a grunt. He grits his teeth and grinds out her name. He pulls out again, angry at himself for not being as gentle as he wanted but holding back as best as he can. He decides to give her some space to adjust, presses his forehead into her hair and breathes her in, suckles her neck as he tries to grind slower, trust gentler. He presses forward and up, then drops his hips when he pulls back, dragging himself out. 

 

She whimpers in his ear as he sets a steady pace. At first she tries not to cry out but before long they are both banting and sweating. Their bodies are slick as his abs slide over hers and he keeps a hand around his shaft to keep from striking her too deeply. At some point her hand is applying chakra induced excessive pressure to his wrist and he lets go of the hand on himself, allows himself to full sheath inside her. He shivers as he bottoms out, his mind still trying to adjust to the fact that this is not a genjutsu. Lee is really inside of Sakura!

 

Lee draws her into his arms and scoops her up beneath him, repositions them so he is on his knees and heels. His thumbs find her hips and he raises them to meet his own. Spots form in his eyes and Sakura closes hers, her hands fall limp beside her head as her head falls back, her words incoherent whimpers. She is more beautiful than he could have ever imagined, writhing beneath him in bliss. 

 

Lee smiles and breathes deeply, taking back some control as his hands slide beneath her thighs and his movements become slower, more controlled. He strikes her when she cries out the most, adjusting his rhythm and technique until even her breaths and sighs have a rhythm to his movements. Sakura may no longer be aware of what is happening in her state of pleasure, of who is granting her this experience in her surrender but he knows damn well he is the only one who do this the right way, can worship her like the goddess she is! He suckles her breasts, alternating, as he slows further, savours her in her stupor.

 

Sakura would normally beat the shit out of anyone who would take advantage of her, put who would out her in such a vulnerable state. Pride wells within him and spurs him on as he picks up his pace. His balls are aching again in denied release and as she tenses around him and cums hard. Lee wishes desperately to join her. 

 

Sakura's legs are spread wide for him as she rides her orgasm again, his hand applying pressure to her abdomen, he can nearly feel his thursa inside her, feel her body tense and relax for him. He presses a thumb to her clitoris and rubs as she cums again and again. He has met his strike count twice now as her cries become piercing in his ears and he slumps over her, folding her like a pretzel. Lee is begging her to release him but her mind is somewhere else. In his frustration, he debates pulling out, denying her pleasure until she acknowledges him once more but he cannot so it. She is too good a fuck for him to stop. Lightning runs up and down his spine, in his stomach, through his abdomen. His nipples are hard and all of his erogenous zones are on fire! He releases the first two gates, for stamina and endurance, to deal with the pain of not being allowed to cum. It feels good, so fucking good, to be inside her but even Lee can only take so much punishment.  

 

Lee is moaning in pleasure and agony and he knows only he can keep up with her. He expected a virgin and his cock is now being consumed by the most ravenous, greedy whore he has ever encountered. He wonders how he can perform with his balls so swollen, tight against himself. He changes position, pulling her right thigh against his chest and swings his right thigh over her left knee. He growls and presses his weight into her as she screams his name. She twists so she is half on her side and half on her heat and his fingers dig into her ass and thighs as he pulls her to the edge of the bed and stands, taking her harder and faster. 

 

“Aaarrghhaaaaa!!!! Fuck! Sakura-sama! Release this fucking seal!” He is crying now in agony, past the threshold of pain and pleasure and he doesn’t know how she is enjoying how hard he is fucking her. He pulls out with a sigh of frustration, removes the broken condom, retrieves another and lubricates himself again. He crawls behind her on bed as she pants and sobs, recovering from her latest release. He spoons her.

 

“Ooh god, Lee.” He breathes in deeply at her words, pleasure running through him as she is begging for him and not someone else! Her fingers grasp him behind the head and she tugs painfully on his locks as he enters her roughly once and she begs him. The sound of his name being forced from her throat between open mouthed kisses makes him groan in agony.

 

“Fuck! Don’t stop!” She sobs,”Don’t you dare fucking stop!” He squeezes and massages each of her breasts as she pulls up her thigh and plays with herself and he watches in the mirror and over her shoulder. His eyes roll back in his head and his body is moving on instinct.

 

“Fuck, Sakura! Release this fucking seal before you kill me!” He shoves her forward a little roughly and pulls out, rolls onto his back. His body is on fire and the seal is spiralling and glowing as he pants. He writhes, his body going limp and Sakura climbs into his laps. He looks at her, frowning in frustration and determination. She knows he will not stop until she is satisfied but she is loving this so fuckif much. She kisses him slow and hard as she takes herself on him, heads her fingers through his and takes the lead. “Sakura… sama… please.” 

 

Lee parts his legs, pushes up to allow her a seat to ride. He supports her rhythm as her hands push off of his, until his head falls back to the pillow and his whimpers become silent shivvers. He wraps his thighs up and over her hips, pulls her down onto his lap with his legs on each slow, hard grind, both curled in on each other and she reaches back, presses her middle finger inside of his ass, thrusts him the way he is taking her. 

 

Lee begins to cry, actually cry, as the pleasure becomes too much and he is a mindless wreck. He is sobbing and whimpering and crying her name. He has writhed so much beneath her, his head and neck has fallen off the bed. His head is spinning and he is drifting in and out of consciousness as his body nears its limit. He loves how her fingers expertly pump inside him as he tenses his glutes, his body arching off the bed. If Sai wasn’t such a cold-hearted bitch, he wonders if he could handle both of them this way, inside of Sakura with Sai inside of him. Exhaustion is nagging him and he is too tired to give the possibly a coherent thought. So much for training Sakura today. 

 

Sakura smiles at him with tears in her own eyes and grants his wish, releasing the seal.

 

Lee goes through a range of emotions, kissing her, crying, shaking. She was the virgin and yet he is the one who is vulnerable. He shivers, the release is so pleasurable, enduring her sweet torture is so rewarding he decides to allow her to do this anytime she wants. If they stop Sasuke, Lee pledges to be her personal, willing sex-slave and he does not care if she is hokage or not. He wants her, needs her! 

 

Lee screams as he writhes emptying his seed inside of her! He may break the condom from how much she has denied him, his release is so strong, his production so backed up. He does not care! He will take responsibility if he impregnates her. He will marry her. He dreams of it happening in this moment and the intensity is so much he wishes it was their wedding night. He thought he loved Sakura before but now he cannot even put a name to how much he feels as sunshine and rainbows, fireworks, burst behind his eyes. He falls half off the bed, his hips still on the mattress with her still seated in his lap, so glad their culture makes beds so close to the floor and he wraps his arms around her. He pulls her hard against his body, kisses her hard and deep, places a chaste kiss on her temple. He pants hard and she snuggles into him and tugs the blanket, also half off the bed, around them lazily. 

 

“Thank you, Lee.” She whispers, her face buried in his shoulder and her fingers arms curled into his sides, fingers playing lazily on his ribs. Normally he is ticklish but right now everything feels good. He groans and his eyes roll back in his head they close in exhaustion. He runs his hands lazily over her lower back and ass.

 

“No, thank you, Sakura-chan.” He sighs into his sleeping, hoping this is a lasting bond, “I will protect you with my life.” Fuck everything else that is happening. He will deal with it once his brain is no longer scrambled inside his head. This moment is now what Lee lives for. It is all he has to live for. He refuses to die and leave her vulnerable. As strong as she is, she is still human and he is determined to keep her safe, the way he always has.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I kinda want to end the fic here but this is a dystopian so I will be a bit of a sadist and add some drama in the next chaptee and possibly a few timeskip drabbles.
> 
> I really enjoyed writing this so thanks for reading. If I don't write more I will atleast write some outlines of things I would have included. 
> 
> I am very happy with how this turned out. Thanks again to tineyninja for inspiration and my troll for making me say fuck it, I like boys that like their butts finger so fuck you troll. 
> 
> XD Jiraiya better be proud of this!
> 
> Thanks


	4. Abstract Art

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sai and Lee cross paths. Lee has another breakdown and Sai has never been good at picking up the peices. Gai is summoned to the Hokage Tower and Lee powders his life choices.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Darker chapter. Again, happy to end this fic here with this but may add another chapter where everything falls apart. 
> 
> What I don't remember from tineyninjas fic is 1) if Sai is alive. I want to say no? I am disappointed if he is dead. He is a fav of mine so yeah, in my fic henis alive 2) if anbu exists anymore? Eh I think Sai and everyone in anbu got the axe, literally? 3) if the Hokage monument innthe mountains even exists or if Sasuke had it blown up. Again, probably destroyed. These seem like pretty Sasuke things to do.
> 
> I am going tonreread tineyninja's fic but yeah please enjoy.

Lee awakes to a chakra flare outside of Sakura's window. He remembers that Sai knows he is here, has followed him like a good, concerned partner. He knows Sai is loyal to Kakashi, was Loyal to Naruto, hates Sasuke and is has become very protective of Sakura since their mission to the land of Iron. He does not know however however how Sai feels about him taking this 'personal mission' of his further with Sakura. They have barely spoken since the incident between them, outside of work and training. Lee is still a subordinate and under probation. Sai does not like his non-exclusive lover risking his life and survival on hopeless causes. Lee’s wards have already destroyed some of Sai’s messenger mice that have tried to sneak into Sakura's apartment. Lee ignores the flare again and falls back asleep. When Sai flares again, Lee wishes he could direct killing intent like every ninjutsu capable shinobi. He wants to throw something at the window but does not wish to disturb his new lover in his arms.

 

He smiles softly, glad that at least the condom did not fail the second time. Although he does wish Sakura to be the mother of his children and always has, he would never force a decision upon her. Besides, he would not bring children into a world where Sasuke is it’s king. He knows Sasuke is barely staying in power, Orichimaru easily throws his weight at the boy. Even Kakashi is learning to get his way with Sasuke. He rescued Yamato but now Lee’s first anbu sensei, Anko, is gone. He wonders if Sai will join their cause or if Sai will take Lee’s entanglement with Sakura as a betrayal. They are not exclusive and no relationship has been discussed. It is Lee’s fault for bringing work home, bringing Sai home but Sai never wants to discuss things with him. The whole point of Lee’s anbu training is to cut off his emotions, to focus himself and not let his personal issues affect his performance. Lee has never been good at this, even if he can withstand the most brutal of interrogation.

 

Lee has already picked Sakura up, has placed her in bed. He has cleaned himself up, dressed in his uniform, minus his sandals out of respect. Now he was enjoying a much deserved cuddle-nap in the early afternoon, already annoyed that he must deny himself snuggling her naked form fully dressed. He chooses to go back to sleep though he knows Sakura would not be happy if he got himself killed in defiance of his duty. He looks at her clock. He is off duty for another few hours anyways.

 

There is a familiar knock on Sakura's door and Lee stiffens as he wakes again. He is glad to have spent the night here, to have stayed the morning. For a woman whose life is in danger, Sakura sleeps very deeply. It shows how exhausted she is, how much she trusts him. Sasuke has isolated all of their friends, kept them from being able to socialize or conspire. As is, Lee is neglecting most of his duties today though one of them is to spy on Sakura’s movements. He has however neglected his other personal mission, to keep an eye on Gai-sensei.

 

The knock is there again and Gai calls out for Sakura. Lee is already dressed in his uniform, prepared for anything even in his sleep and he reluctantly leaves the warmth of her bed. “Lee.” She whimpers in her sleep and he smiles softly as he exist his room, then answers her door.

 

“Gai-sensei.” Lee bows respectfully, his cheeks flushed in embarrassment. At least he is dressed. He could chose to explain his arrangement with Sakura to Gai-sensei or he can choose to confirm or deny the truth.

 

Gai’s eyes raise for a moment in surprise but then string arms are pulling Lee out into the hallway. Gai hugs him tightly and Lees heart melts. He has been watching Gai from a distance for so long now, he almost forgets how to speak to his sensei. “Lee!” Gai gives another squeeze then pulls back as he begins to cry. Lee wants to join him in tears but not out of his usual, nostalgic happiness. Lee is anbu now. The secrets he keeps holds lives in his hands. He cries anyways, for his sensei, for Sakura’s sensei, for their lost friends.

 

“Gai-sensei!” He only allows one tear before he begins to pull himself inside, widing the rubber snakes that are his emotions back into his imaginary surprise can. “It’s so good to see you again!” 

“Likewise! Yosh!!” Gai gives him a smile and a thumbs up. Lee beams a genuine smile, another rare, nostalgic thing he holds onto but rarely expresses and debates if to allow him into Sakura’s home or to close the door behind him. Lee’s hesitation is brief as he opens the door, steps aside and gestures for Gai to enter. He knows Sakura’s place is safe from prying eyes and ears, after all, he has inspected it himself.

 

Gai-sensei’s head darts around inside for a brief moment, seeking Sakura. He awkwardly hesitate as well, unsure if to sit on the couch or hightail it out of here. He decides to gesture with his head for Lee to close Sakura’s bedroom door. Lee yelps and does just that as Gai heads to her kitchen to brew some tea. He has been here a few times after training her and knows his way around well enough. “Would you, like some tea?” He clears his throat and Lee stiffens. 

“Mm, yes, Gai-sensei. Thank you very much.” Lee sits stiffly on the couch with his usual frown and Gai leaves him be until the tea is ready. He brings the teapot over with two cups and sits beside Lee, serves them both, then pulls out a scroll.

“Sai came by my apartment. He said to give you this.” He passes it to Lee and Lee inspects the scroll for traps. Gai watches him but says nothing, knowing how secretive anbu ops are. He never liked that Lee was forced into anbu but supports him nonetheless. Sasuke appears to be a fair and concerned hokage, after all, he did negotiate Yamato’s safe return. Lee takes a sip of his too hot tea and nods, waiting to hear what Gai has to say as he tucks the scroll away. He has a non-urgent summoning for perimeter checks on the village with Sai for tomorrow morning. Lee puts the cup down and straightens, his mental mask in place.

“It's just a notification of a non-urgent routine perimeter check for tomorrow.” Lee reluctantly makes eye contact with Gai-sensei and refrains from yelping. Gai smiles warmly at him.

“Mm.” Gai sips his tea and also puts it down, “I passed by Sakura’s work today to see if she was okay after yesterday’s training.” He pauses. “I see I have no reason to worry about her with you here. So, is this guard duty or do we need to have 'the talk’ again?” Lee chuckles nervously in reply then smiles softly.

“No, Gai-sensei. I remember the talk and this is,” he chuckles again, “not guard duty?” Gai raises an eyebrow and that is all it takes for Lee to start crying, bowing and reciting formal apologies. 

“Woah, Lee, it’s okay!” Gai leans over and hugs him tightly. Lee groans in slight pain. Sakura has really clawed his back and shoulders. He has bruises all over his body from her grip and the ones on his shoulder are bare and visible. He does not want her to heal them. He thinks the entire village must know what they were up to this morning after all the noise they made. His ear is still ringing as they are both louder in bed than previously anticipated.

“I’m happy you two are dating, Lee. Just try to close the bedroom door before you invite a guest in next time when your lover is asleep. I thought I taught you more respect than that.” Lee groans as Gai mockingly punches his arm, right where Sakura has bruised his bicep with her strength. Lee starts to sputter in defense but he ends up just puffing out his cheeks comically and blowing his bangs out of his face with his lower lip sticking out. He digs the heels of his palms into his eyes and sobs.

“It’s complicated, Gai-sensei.” He realizes that it is. He and Sai are not together so this is neither a breakup or a rebound but he and Sakura are also, not really together, right? Right? He bites his lower lip, brows furrowed in frustration. Gai just gives him a squeeze on the same shoulder and Lee yelps but stops crying.

“I’m happy for you, Lee and I trust whatever you are doing, you will be responsible and figure things out.”

“Yes, Gai-sensei.” Lee smiles with a thumbs up and Gai smiles back. He finishes his tea in one gulp.

“Yosh!! So, since you're here and Sakura is asleep,” they both rise and Gai points over his shoulder at the door, “Do you want to spar?” Lee falls over the back of the couch with a moan.

“Gai-sensei-!”

 

Lee leaves a note for Sakura and Gai can tell he is unwilling to leave the apartment. Gai offers to pick up Yamato and bring ingredients for a quick lunch but then Lee is equally reluctant to let him go. He cannot be in two places at once. Sakura knows there has been an attempt on her life. She is a strong, capable kunoichi and has survived without him at her side thus far. Gai-sensei can no longer use the gates. He cannot use genjutsu or taijutsu. He cannot heal himself with the 100-Healing technique. He is not defenseless but he is no match for someone like Sasuke in his current state. Lee doesn't even know why Gai is training Sakura at this point. Maybe Gai-sensei too is broken and needs to have another person to care about in order to live. He is glad Sakura is that person because Kakashi is still alive but out of reach and a death sentence. 

 

Lee crumples the note at the door and decides to wake her instead, just to be sure. He promises to visit her again as soon as he is available. He never knows where he will be or when as his duties are defined by his hokage’s whims but he promises to watch out for her in the village. He has decided to end his other “arrangements” and wants to be exclusive to her but is afraid to ask, afraid she will reject him again, afraid she will say that after their encounter she still does not know what she wants, just like Sai. He gives her a kiss on her forehead, a full body hug like it is the last time he will ever hold her, ingraining the feel of her body into his muscle memory and cannot resist kissing her deeply as Gai-sensei waits in the doorframe of the apartment. He knows he should be more respectful, more discreet but their public displays of affection may be the thong that takes her off Sasuke's watch list, hopefully his kill list, too.

 

Gai-sensei does not question Lee’s new behaviours, his lapse in manners. He had already seen what anbu did to Kakashi and he does not wish the same on his student. He has tried to convince Lee to leave, does not understand why he was recruited on the first place. That's okay with Lee, too. He does not want to let Gai-sensei know what is really happening in the village, what is happening to his sensei’s object of affections. Gai-sensei must stay blissfully ignorant. It will keep him safe. 

 

They stop at a dango shop for a quick snack and before Lee can finish eating, Sai sends a bird to summon him. Sai is his superior and captain but he does not want to see him right now, especially with Gai-sensei. Sai has no right to question his sexuality when Sai does not know his own sexual orientation yet. It pisses Lee off even if it a misunderstanding. Lee is fine with Sai being a brutal leader but has had enough of Sai being a cold person and even colder lover. Their bond formed during the war is quickly dissolving, slipping through their hands like sand grasped too tightly and Lee feels he has already dealt with it. Gai noticed the tension in Lees posture, as good as he hides it but they are both masters of reading the human body. He says nothing, eats his dango, sips his tea. Before the war their conversations flowed freely, happily as they babbled back and forth like a stream, laughter bubbling and challenges flying back and forth. Now, Lee has closed himself off. It's hard to talk about anything when your job is a 24/7 mess of conspiracy and secrecy. Lee is barely holding onto his existence as is. He stares at his dango, wishing again that he had died in the war. Gai-sensei is patient and does not pry but Lee does not like the change of atmosphere being anbu causes.

 

Lee senses a presence and finishes his tea, then pushes his plate towards Gai. “Lee?” Gai watches him with surprise and  money out to pay the bill. He knows Gai-sensei is probably not being compensated for the guest he shares his home with so he wishes not to be a burden even though Gai always paid for Team Gai's meals in the past. 

“I am sorry, Gai-sensei. I am suddenly not very hungry. Please enjoy my dango.” Lee turns away before Gain can question him and stops short of leaving. A hand comes down on Gai’s shoulder. It’s Sai in his anbu gear. Lee straightens but does not turn around as he hears Sai’s voice.

“Maito-san. Your Hokage requests your presence immediately.” His voice is monotone as usual and Lee inhales slowly. 

“I will escort him.” Lee waits for Gai-sensei to stand and Sai releases Gai’s shoulder. His hands return to his cloak.

“No, you will not.” Lee knows it is a command and not a request but he walks to the doorway and waits for Gai. Gai’s gaze flickers between the two men as Lee dons his mask and waits patiently refusing to move from the doorway.

“Lee, it’s ok. I’ve been summoned by Lord Sasuke before. We have been discussing funding for implementing new training methods in the academy.” Lee tries not to let the word training bother him. Once it was holy word to him and now it is a curse with Sai standing so close to him.

“Tortoise-san and I must also do some training.” Lee can feel the fake smile creeping into Sai’s voice and his blood begins to boil. He does not know where Sai stands anymore, for or against the hokage, for or against himself.

“I am still recovering from chakra exhaustion.” He knows Sai lied for him, covered for him and he will not even look Sai in his masked-face. Sai probably knows that Lee is now more than Sakura's fake lover as well. Lee glances at Gai over his shoulder.

“Lets go.” 

 

Lee can hear Sai’s unclothed finger of his gloved hands itch his palm. It's a twitch he has when he isn't holding his paintbrush. Sai actually does have some emotions now but has regressed since the war. Lee wants to be happy that Sai is feeling something but he is far too fed up with Sai’s behaviour to care. Gai starts putting pieces of a puzzle together in his head but once again lets it go. Kurenai and Asuma had these kinds of silent fights all the time and no one suspected their relationship until he died and Kurenai became a widowed, single mother.

 

Lee makes a fist. He wants to unwind and rebind the cloth wrapped rightly under his gloves. He has not improved much on holding in his hot-blooded anger. If anything, it’s gotten worse with his new training. There is a reason he and Tenten are not together and do not visit Gai-sensei at the same time. What Gai-sensei does not know will not hurt him and their schedules are complex enough that it does not matter.

“Lee.” Gai knows Sai is his former-students new captain and he wants to support Lee’s decisions but does not want him to be punished for insubordination.

“It is alright, Maito-san. Let Tortoise-san rest. I know he has already seen a medic today for his needs.” Gai is the one holding his tongue, unsure if that was Lee’s cover or an insult. Lee knows Sai well enough to call it like it is. He is glad his masks hides his face. He wants to show Sai how he feels with his fists. 

“I am going to the Hokage now, gentlemen.” Gai bows and gives Lee a shove on the back, puts him into a one armed hug and presses a kiss to his temple. 

“Thank you, Gai-sensei.” Lee bows, “Please, take care of yourself.” Lee clamps his eyes shut and knows Gai has no idea what he means. Gai nods and leaves the shop, finishing the dango on his stick.

 

Sai gives Lee a signal that directs Lee to follow. It’s been months since they have spoken outside of work. Sai summons a bird and they take a silent ride to their meeting place above the destroyed Hokage monuments. As soon as his feet hit land, Lee throws his mask to the floor. His tanto and nunchaku go next in the pile. Sai watches, as cold as ever through the slits of his mask. Lee discards his weapons pouches next. He wants nothing lethal on his person as he tries to sate his anger. Neither speaks. Lee wants to say that this is pointless but that is pointless, too. He sits on the floor in the lotus position and meditates. If he were not so exhausted from the constant training, missions and marathon sex with Sakura, he’d open the gates to six and level the Forest of Death. 

 

Both men have been raised to follow with complete obedience. Kakashi has taught Sai to reject this rule when it risks the life of comrades. Gai has taught Lee to reject this rule when he feels ends do not justify the means. Lee knows they are both obedient for the sake of survival. 

 

“It is unfortunate that we must speak with each other.” Lee says it. “I respect you, Sai, as a commander and fellow shinobi but as a person, I don't know who you anymore and frankly,” he hesitate, choosing words carefully as always, “I don’t want to.” He cannot say he does not care to know Sai, in fact, he cares too much. Lee loves too deeply and it has left him broken several times since Neji died. 

 

Lee swallows a sob and Sai still does not speak. Sai instead also discards his mask in the pile and takes out his sketchbook. He begins to draw an abstract of Lee, trying to express his emotions. Lee stands and slaps the sketchbook out of Sai’s hands when he hears the pencil scraping in rapid succession. He wants to tear it apart and throw it from the mountain. “Why have you brought me here, Sai!? Speak!” Sai’s eyes flick to his sketchbook in the dirt. It is the one he loves he most, the one filled pages and pages of Lee. Eroric art, interrogations, they are all the same to him and all are beautiful, all are proof of Lee’s surrenders to him. He hesitates but does not make eye contact. Lee steps on the sketchbook and grinds his foot. A tear falls from Sai’s eyes as his eyes flutter open. 

“You said you would not speak to me outside of work.” Lee's gaze is intense on him and Sai itches to draw him. He tries again, “I wanted to report to you on our mutual friends.” Lee grabs Sai by his shirt and pulls him up off the rock he is sitting on.

“Is Gai-sensei safe?” Lee’s eyes dart to the Hokage Tower below them but he does not let go.

“Yes!” Sai clutches the fabric at his throat as Lee releases him. He bends with hesitation and retrieves his artbook. “It’s Captain Yamato. Sasuke wants him to come train Anbu recruits if his rehabilitation is over.” Lee purses his lips together. If he was angry before, he is fuming now. “Lee.” Sai reaches for him but holds back.

“I need to go.” 

“Lee!” Sai barely touches his back then Lee is gone, darting at top speed down the mountain.

 

When Sai finds him again, Lee is at one of his favourite training grounds. It’s the one where he and Gai like to rock climb and punch boulders for fun. He punches the boulders harder until his fists bleed, hitting hard and slow. Lee is exhausted and the sun is setting but he does not stop as Sai approaches. He whimpers and grunts with exertion, finally collapsing with his forehead and palms pressed to the rock. 

“What.” Lee growls at Sai. Sai’s mask is still off. Lee's tools were left at the top of the mountain and Sai rests them gently out of harm's way at his feet. He knows Lee does not like to be disturbed when he is training here but he does not want him unarmed and vulnerable, even if Lee does not need weapons to defend himself. It’s these little things that drew Lee to him in the first place. Sakura’s kindness must have rubbed off well on Sai at some point, surprising as that is. It makes Lee laugh every time he thinks it. Sakura had probably punched both of them more than she has ever been kind. He loves that, too. Lee likes a steady hand to keep him in place. As unhealthy as he knows it is, it grounds him.

 

Lee has spent so much time training here, with Kiba, Neji, Naruto and Tenten. He misses all of them. The loss of Tenten hits him the hardest. She is still alive but after seeing what Lee has become, she no longer wants to see him. She has her own demons to battle and refuses to betray who she is. Tenten will likely go into hiding if she has not already. Her disdain for Sasuke is well known and she resents that Lee begged her to accept Sasuke’s leadership. She would have rather died. Now he wishes he was dead all the same.

“I, I needed to see you again.” Sai presents the sketchbook to Lee, unsure what to do with it. “You may destroy it, if you wish.” Lee refuses to face him. He knows what Sai is holding. He knows how much the book means to Sai, what it means to Sai, what it means to himself. He steps back from the wall, closes his eyes and begins punching again. Sai drops the book when he sees the blood seeping from Lee’s hands and he reaches into his medkit to dress Lee’s hands. Lee pulls away from Sai's touch before he is even close enough to make contact but Sai insists.

 

Lee slams him against the boulder roughly and lifts him to his height. Sai is smaller than him but is not as fragile as he looks but unlike Lee, he does not do well with a heavy hand. Lee releases him as he fights his own emotions. He wants Sai as badly as wants Sakura and Tenten. Lee hates that his nature is polyamorous but he does not wish to betray his new relationship. He has always loved Sakura and he wants to give this a chance, even if everything he touches falls to shit. 

The first time he learned that no matter how hard he worked, he could not surpass an obstacle, was his inability to use Taijutsu and Ninjutsu. Lee still became a jounin. 

 

The second time is when the first woman he falls in love with and  stays in love with, rejects him. He thought that maybe if he became a splendid shinobi, she may love him, too. It does not happen but he does not falter.

 

The third time is after the chuunin exams. The third time's the hardest. He fights and fights to recover but all he does is injure himself more. Gai does not give up on him. Salura does not give up on him. It takes a promise from Gai-sensei, a pseudo-suicide pact, for him to take the surgery that may kill him. It still takes him years to properly recover. 

 

The last insult is Lee’s a genetic disorder that is devastating to a ninja.  He cannot manipulate chakra outside of his body. Having children with a fellow shinobi would be a disservice to the survival of the village. It's a part of why his lovelife has always sucked. Clans want good, strong heirs and he is not good breeding stock.

 

Now Lee is older, the list of his challenges and failures have changed. Despite his willingness to commit, no one wishes to truly love him, to take him as he is. He cannot even protect the people he loves. Worst of all, he can’t let them go. 

 

Lee stares down at Sai’s powerful, lithe body. His androgynous, pretty face and exposed midriff has always been enticing to many shinobi of both sexes. Sai has also been trained in the arts of both interrogation and seduction. Seduction is new to him, new to them both but it is a part of their life now and Lee tries his best not to encourage their behaviour anymore. Neither of them has had to take a mission of that nature and Lee does not plan on ever having to. Their entanglement started when they trained together, partners at work and then partners in the bedroom. Lee hates what this has done to them but his need for physical comfort is so strong that he can barely deny himself from taking Sai right now. Instead, Lee grabs his own hair in frustration and crumples to the floor. 

 

Sai does not move as Lee wraps his arms around himself and begins to cry. If he is not fucking, fighting or training he doesn’t know what to do with himself. It's unhealthy and he hates himself but this is what training from root has done to him. Sai slides down and opens the book. He begins to draw, also turning in on himself as he listens to Lee’s sobs. There is beauty in his breakdown. He does not know how to provide comfort to Lee. It’s why he has allowed Lee to seek out Tenten and now Sakura. He is afraid to touch Lee without restraints, his own trauma and training bars him from truly knowing what Lee needs. He sighs and continues to scratch away at the same abstract and finally speaks as Lee’s breathing begins to even out and his sobs become quieter. He is afraid to speak his thoughts to Lee on Sakura, afraid either will punch him. He does it anyways.

 

“I suppose Sakura could not meet your needs, either.”

 

This is what makes Lee get so emotional. Instead of Sai’s presence once being a quiet comfort in his now much more frequent breakdowns, Sai’s need to speak the obvious cuts deeper than the problem in the first place. Tenten initially was a great first girlfriend but she couldn't handle him crying every time they made love, couldn't handle him being too rough. He does not blame her for leaving the same way he cannot blame Sai for his emotional constipation. This is his problem and he cannot find an appropriate outlet. Instead of things in the village getting better, they are getting worse. If he were to lose any of his friends now, he-! Lee's thoughts of punishment trails off and so he thinks about how Gai-sensei or Sakura-chan would feel if they found his body at the bottom of the Hokage monument and he cries more. 

 

Lee knows that as a Taijutsu master, he is the master of his body. Limits are meant to be broken and his only limits are his strength of will and how much his body can take. He has no control  of his life now.  He belongs to his hokage and his emotions and no matter how he tries, his life is not his own. He wonders if Sakura would still accept him in her life if she knew what a trainwreck he’d become, how his sense of positivity has become a charade. He suspects that this is why Gai-sensei is so positive, if it’s all a facade to keep surviving. He does not want to know and he does not want Gai-sensei to know his suspicions nor his conclusions. 

 

Lee sobs one final time and picks himself up off the floor. He retrieves his things from the neat pile on the floor and stumbles out of the canyon. Sai does not look up from his drawing of a broken doll; it dangles from puppet strings made of white muslin ribbons, blood dripping from its hands and its heart torn to shreds, bleeding rivers of blood filled with insects to a puddle beneath it on the floors. 

 

Sai knows Lee does not want him there, even though they still share a room in the anbu barracks. Instead, Sai will wait for the sun to set and return to their room. If Lee is asleep he will go to bed in his own bunk quietly and not disturb him, if he is not then he will search for Lee in the morning as he has for the past few months. 

 

They have a mission together in the morning. Lee likes to be punctual so Sai does not worry but the last 24 hours makes him question his confidence in his partner. Lee reports to him directly anyways so he can always safely cover for him. Sai is wondering if it's really such a good idea to keep doing this. 

 

Before he unlocked his emotions and formed bonds, Sai never feared anything but now there is much that could be used against him if he allows himself to feel. He hopes Lee seeks Sakura out and wants to believe it will end well for them. Sakura is a passionate person, much like Lee. If not, he hopes it ends painlessly, knowing very well the two of them are going to get themselves killed.

 

Sakura wakes up to a faint knock on her window. She seeks out the chakra signature and is surprised to find its Lee. She has one more day off from work for chakra exhaustion herself and has her house calls at Gai and Yamato’s place in the morning but Lee has a mission tomorrow. She disarms her place and allows him in. He climbs in through her window and smiles warmly as usual with his big, dopey grin. This time it warms her heart differently than it usually does. This time, it flares a coil of arousal through her body.

 

“Lee!” She hugs him tightly. She misses him already as she does all of her friends but Lee has always been special to her, more so now than ever before. She doesn't need to ask why he is here. It's the same reason they ended up here yesterday. Instead she asks, “Are you hungry? Captain Yamato has started cooking and his curry is amazing! Gai-sensei and Captain Yamato actually had leftovers this time!” She rolls her eyes, “I am working on both their manners though. Pigs would be offended to be compared to those two!” She thinks of the pot roast Sasuke made out of Tonton when he killed Tsunade and Shizune and holds in her frown. They smile at each other instead, resorting to survival tactics. Lee leans in and gives her a kiss on her forehead. She senses tension in his body but leaves it alone, too. He sighs in relief, knowin Gai-sensei made it home safely.

“Thank you, Sakura-chan. That would be wonderful.” He closes her window and shuts the blinds, waits for her to rearm her traps, then follows her to her living room. Sakura heats up the food and Lee hums as he digs in. All he’s had to eat in two days is that discarded bite of dango and a handful of food pills. Lee believes no food can be considered bad but remembers how awful Sakura’s food pills taste. They would make a fine punishment for an incomplete task. Sakura sips a cup of tea and reads a book beside him on the couch. Her cheeks are flushed and she can't make eye contact with him.

“Sakura-chan.” He slides a hand to her knee, wondering if what happened in the early morning was truly just experimentation and a one time thing. His heart flutters and he wonders if he has misread her intentions to have him visit again. Perhaps it is too soon and she thinks he is desperate. 

 

She closes her book and lets it drop to the coffee table before she climbs into his lap. She is kissing and touching him before his brain can recover from his doubts. He moans into the kiss and she grinds into his lap, pulling at his vest. Lee pulls back and leans into the cushions against the arm of the couch. Sakura loves the noises he makes as she runs her fingers through his hair, gently scratches his scalp. Lee is so glad he took the risk of coming to her again and he hopes she never turns him down ever again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading and if you like this fic, olease comment/kudos/bookmark.
> 
> There is possibly more to come but maybe not. I want them to have a happy ending but maybe I will write alternate endings.


	5. Echi Echi Sakura

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sakura is realizing she loves Lee's brand of crazy. Things become strained between them but things also have a way of working out. 
> 
> The more she sees of Lee's unihibited erotic nature, the more she craves him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More shy-exhibitionist!Lee in this chapter.
> 
> The next chapter will include training between Lee and Sakura.

Sakura is surprised when Lee enters her apartment. Lee’s tension in his body understandably wanes when she mentions that she has seen Gai-sensei this evening. She blushes as Lee eats the meal he missed out on and she reads her book. He does not apologize for missing dinner, both of which are out of character. Lee is always respectful and punctual to a fault. She worries about Kakashi but she thinks that even if Lee did see anything, he would not tell her. So she sits beside him on the couch as he eats and has trouble making eye contact.

 

She has treated her body for minor injuries; love bites, bruises, scratches on her skin. She has changed her sheets. Some of the blood she knows is Lee’s; from her digging her nails in his skin, scratching his back in her erotic haze; some of it may be from where he roughly took himself on her fingers. Some of the blood is her own. She is a medic and she knows it is not true that virgins bleed. She knows she was well prepared. She also knows they both got carried away and she pushed Lee past the limits of any man’s will with her maybe not so considerate or well planned seal. Still, she feels an ache where his incredible length has bruised her perineum, where his fingers have marked her thighs, where his teeth nipped and licked and sucked her neck as she drove him to madness. She nearly whimpers, bites it back deep in her throat and hides her blush behind her book. She watches the way the chopsticks bring food to his mouth and she wants those lips on hers again, both pairs of lips. She tries her best not to squirm as she patiently lets him eat in silence. Lee seems to be thinking, his brows deep in thought. She is not used to his silence; even when Neji died, Lee was so animated in Gai’s presence. She enjoyed the few times she ran into him, despite Lee working at the hospital to help patients with rehabilitation. He is not there for long as Sasuke resigns him to his current position. 

 

“Sakura-chan.” He puts his chopsticks down and rests his hand on her knee. In a moment, her book is slammed shut, discarded and she doesn't know what is bothering him but she does know what might make him happy. She doesn’t know who kissed first as she straddles him, grinding into his lap but she needs this this as much as him. She takes the lead and he allows it, submitting to her touch. Sakura can already feel his hardness as she strips his armor off and she wonders if he came here for her company or for her unique kind of comfort. He winces when she pulls off his gloves. She pauses jumps back, surprised at the amount of blood soaking his hand, running up his forearm. She wonders of it’s all his own. Lee chuckles and removes his other glove with a whimper, revealing the matching hand. “I’m sorry, Sakura-chan. Do you think you can maybe change these for me? I might have overdone my training a little.” He smiles from ear to ear until his eyes close and gives her a thumbs up. 

 

Sakura punches him on his anbu tattoo, which is also still bruised from their encounter. 

“You idiot!” She growls as he falls over the arm of her couch. Lee is laughing, sprawled out on the floor as she comes to treat his injuries. “Hold still.” She takes one hand and unwraps the bandages. She sends him to wash his hands. When he returns, her medical kit is out and fresh bandages and an ointment are laid out on the table. She heals his wounds and applies the ointment with a complementary massage. She then kisses each of his knuckles as she locks her eyes on his. Lee does not move but sighs softly as she caresses his scars hands. Lee rarely has his hands uncovered in public, not in shame but in modesty. Civilians do not understand how hard he has worked to earn his strength. Sakura does. She has worked as hard as Lee to become strong and now, she chooses to follow the path he and Gai have walked; hard work, guts, effort. Sakura will likely never have these scars to show for her effort. 

 

He sighs softly, not sure if he envies it or feels sad for her. He likes the proof of his labours and he considers never wearing bandages again; his anbu gloves come to his elbows and cover the scars. He uses shinobi wire for the Lotus now anyways. Lee rubs his thumb over his knuckles, scratching lightly at his scars with a just as callused thumb pad. The scarring helps keep his skin from cracking and bleeding when he fights. He wonders if that would ever be a problem for her, too. 

 

Sakura is still kissing one of his hands when his vision refocuses on her. He smiles softly, grateful for her kindness, patience, affections.

“What’s wrong, Lee-kun?” He smiles a little warmer at his newly earned title and shakes his head.

“Everything is perfect in this moment, Sakura-chan. I am just not used to having someone viewing hands with such affection. Only I bind them now.” He misses his Teammates, his sensei. His smile becomes sad and Sakura pulls back with a blush. She gives his hand a firm squeeze and let's go gently.

“I’m sorry.” 

 

As she leans back and drops his hand gently into his lap, he leans forward, threads his fingers through her hair. His other hand scoops behind her back and he tugs her into his lap, into a deep kiss. He does not want to talk, does not want to think. He needs this. He needs her. The thought of being rejected again is in the back of his mind even as she whimpers against his lips, her body melding to his. “I love you.” It tumbles out and he closes his eyes tightly, instantly regrets regrets his loose tongue. She already know he loves her but he has not said it since they were children, so he says it again. “I love you, Sakura-chan. Even if you never feel the same way,” he continues as his hand slips from her hair to her cheek and he tilts his head back, pulls away from her, “I will always love you.” He goes to lift her out of his lap and she tightens her thighs like a vice. She wants to run but she refuses to let him go! Instead, she grabs him by the hair and kisses him hard. She is not in the mood to talk either.

 

Their clothes hit the floor and she does not not answer his words. There was no question. Before long, they are making out naked on her couch, then she is leaning over its back with him deep inside her. It’s slower this time and he is much more careful.

 

The tension builds slowly inside of her and when he hits the right spot, filling her completely, her orgasm is more intense than before. She is moaning and sobbing and he quickens his thrusts, trying to outlast her as he counts. He is nearing his stroke-count goal and applies his learned techniques to hold on just a little longer, to push a little further. Their hands splinter the back of her couch as they climax together. She cries out one last time and as collapses over the back of the couch. Lee sobs in pleasure, purrs in her ears. He licks her back between her shoulders and literally cries as he holds her right and tries not to slump his weight on top of her. Yes, this moment, this moment, is perfect.

 

She feels his tears against her cheek as he hugs her and holds her against him. She turns her head and kisses him softly. He politely, reluctantly lets her go in silence and she leads him to the other side of the couch. They rest for a few minutes and when she goes to clean him and discard the condom, he does it himself. He ducks his head, excuses himself to the bathroom. 

 

When he comes back, his smile is back on his face. He takes her again, slower this time. He apologizes for the damage to her couch, promises to replace it. Sakura just laughs and kisses him. One hand supports him on the arm of the couch as his sweat slick body twists and flexes slowly, muscles rippling with each grunt of exertion. Her weight nor his is the issues, it is his control. Lee also enjoys grunting gasping in bed as he controls each and every micromovement. He leans over her, his free hand behind her back and she os folded beneath him. Sakura may be tiny but her long legs are over his shoulder st the knee and she actively meets his thrusts, pushing herself off the couch by her shoulders. With a cry, Lee picks up the pace, grinding more than thrusting; she is thursing enough for them both and it doesn't take much movement to satisfy either of them. She hoists herself up with a push of chakra to her shoulders, sending Lee flying to the other arm of the couch. He makes a guttural groan as he catches himself with his free hand again and is pinned by her, resting on the balls of his feet. He leans over the arm of the couch in an abdominal crunch and Sakura takes him harder. Lee begins to lose control of his form, head thrown back and his back arched as Sakura licks the sweat on his chest. He is crying or beneath her, covering her soft moans with his own louder sobs. He clings to her desperately, hands bruising her hips once more as his upper body is falling off the couch. He is so beautiful and uninhibited in throws of passion and Sakura forgets where he ends begins and she begins, who owns the penis joining their bodies. It's not so much a feeling of power that it gives her but more of a sense of relief and fulfillment. She has never had to be fake around Lee. 

 

For Sasuke, she had to invent a personality that he never liked anyways, constantly stroking his ego and for what? He still rejected her and grew up to be a crazy bastard. Lee begins to cry again but his sobs are pure pleasure. He warns her that he is near his limit and her climax triggers his. She wonders if he knows just how many orgasms she experiences seated on his lap, how free it makes her feel. His eyes are comically wide as he comes and he is nearly drooling, completely uninhibited and Sakura is happy to share in his bliss. 

 

He goes limp, limbs sprawled as she pulls off of him and pulls him safely back onto the couch. He rolls to his side, discards the condom in the same bag they used for the other one and he rolls to his side. She climbs into the gap between him and the back, trails her fingernails gently all over his back as he thanks her, sighs in complete bliss and does the same. After a short nap, she leads him by the hand to bed. They both have work at sunrise and neither has the energy nor drive for any kid of heart to heart. She spoons him, her arms wrapped around his body and they drift to sleep in satisfaction.

 

Lee passes by the hospital after work. It’s been a long shift and he is sporting some minor injuries. Sakura does not question it, as she never questions shinobi about their work, only the nature of their injuries. They head home. Home is quickly becoming Sakura’s house as if he has always been there. He knows this is some sort of honeymoon phase and she may tire of him but he knows that she needs him in order to prepare to end Sasuke. People do what they need to survive and although her kindness and passion may be a charade, he accepts it. He does not care. He has Sakura right now and it is all that matters. 

 

After a quick meal, they head to the training fields. That’s when their first argument happens. She accepts that Lee insists that she learns his style - Gai-sensei has been teacher her already. She is fine with learning to use their methods to gain speed. It’s when he says he wants to try opening the seventh gate. He wants to train with her, to have her there as a paramedic. She knows what that did to Gai-sensei; she is the one who treated his wounds after all. Despite Naruto's chakra share and healing of some of Gai's extensive damage before Naruto died, if Orochimaru and Kabuto were not there to assist her, Gai-sensei would be crippled. She would have had to have issued a lethal injection per Sasuke’s orders; Gai was likely to defy him anyways so why waste resources. She is afraid Orochimaru will want to study Lee’s unique genetic condition, highly unlikely but more afraid he will want to examine Gai-sensei in Suna for a “routine follow-up.” She knows damn well how sadistic the snake duo is. If Lee were to die by tearing opening the gates-!

 

Sakura bites her tongue, resist punching him. Oh, she wants to! She’d rather kill Lee herself at this point than see him dead or even worse, crippled again like after the chuunin exams! Tsunade is not here to literally put the pieces back together. Instead she wraps her arms around herself and cries. 

 

Lee shuts down as he watches her. His frown is set for a moment but then his arms are wrapped around her and he holds her silently. He apologizes. He needs an excuse to be on a training field with her, is fearful that someone else will be sent to spy on them. He actually hopes for it a bit; then Sasuke will be convinced that Sakura is not pinning for Kakashi; Sasuke will be convinced that Sakura is not training to kill him.

 

Gai-sensei can no longer use the gates without dying and Lee needs to know how to safely open the seventh if he wants to train her to open the eighth. Opening the seventh is not much of an issue; its the pain that follows. He already hides the pain on he one side from the chuunin exams. Opening the sixth gate is extremely painful but he can do it and safely recover. He can fight the pain. While Lee does like enjoy pain immensely, even he has limits. It's the main reason why he cried when Gai-sensei opened the either gate. Gai-sensei had faltered on something that should have been a continuous attack. He wonders if Gai-sensei would have defeated Madara alone if he had not faltered. He can only imagine the pain his sensei endured in those last moments, enough to make Gai-sensei stop fighting for a moment, knowing his father fell to the same suicide-technique. 

 

He bites his lip and draws blood, knowing Sakura would not allow him to do the same to protect her. Instead she wants to carry this burden herself. Kakashi and Sakura blame themselves for Naruto's death and Sasuke’s rise to power but Lee cannot imagine her failing to kill Sasuke like Naruto had. Lee would also prefer to die defending her, if only it did not leave her in a world where she is even more vulnerable. What is happening to Kakashi, what he witnesses every time it is his turn to guard Sasuke, is worse than death. He imagines Sakura being subjected to such torture, submitting to it and his blood boils. He holds her so tight that he shakes and she begs to be released. With a gasp, he looks at his hands, angry that he has harmed her. He realizes that maybe that is all he is good at; hurting those he loves. He apologizes and flickers away before she can speak. 

 

He returns to her bedroom window a week later, as he has done every night without her knowledge. This time, she is home and he lets himself in having already learned how to disarm her traps. She lays in her nightgown, sound asleep. When he steps down, into her room, a kunai is thrown at  his feet in warning; he does not flinch. She notices his hair is in disarray, his locks lacking it’s silky luster once more. He has a goatee growing in similar to Shikamaru’s and lots of stubble. 

 

Sakura smiles, pulls the covers back and pats the bed beside her. Lee undresses silently to his underwear without any eye contact and he climbs into her bed. She does not resist as he snuggles her. She has missed the feeling of protection his strong, rough arms provide against her soft skin. It remains unscarred due to her 100-healing technique, except for the marks left by Sasori’s blades on her otherwise perfect abdomen. He traces his fingers gently over them, always admiring her strength of body, strength of will, over her beauty.  

 

As usual it is not long before hands start to roam silently under the covers and he is inside her once more. He lifts her thigh as he silently thrust into her from behind. He shifts his weight on top of her, one of her thighs between his legs and she wipes his tears as he cries silently. She knows Lee is sensitive and she accepts his silent apology, accepts his unabashed displays of emotion. Most of the time he is a emotionless blank slate like Sai so it means that much more to her that Lee allows himself to be his old self with her. When he pulls out, he does not make eye contact and goes to clean up silently before climbing back into bed with her and wrapping his arms around her. He inhales her scent, kisses the nape of her neck and sighs on content. He pulls her blanket around them before falling asleep.

 

Their routine becomes like the one he had with Tenten after the rest of his world went to shit; it also mirrors the thing they had been between him and Sai. At first it is sweet but now, one finds the other in bed. No words pass between them when they are not working or training. Their conversations are through body language and eye contact or lack thereof and it seems to suit them just fine. They fuck, they cuddle, they fall asleep. They eat together in silence, do chores in the house but it is far from feeling domestic. He fears the words we need to talk’ are coming for Sakura is a woman and not an anbu woman and he has been cruel to deny her emotional needs as he does his own. He cries more often in bed than before, silently and he tries to bury his shame. Sakura always kisses him softly and pretends she doesn’t notice it, is always receptive to him talking to her but he does not. He says everything is fine and a little hard work never killed anyone. She would know if he opened the gates on his own anyways; he would be either in her hospital or in her morgue. It’s eating her inside that her desire to keep him alive and healthy is a torture to him, has caused a rift in their communication. So she provides him silent support and physical comfort, something they both need more than to wallow in each others pity. Lee has never responded well to pity or sympathy. Pity is overrated; mercy is her specialty. Sometimes he still whispers that he loves her when he cums and she can’t admit it but she loves him too; she loves him so much that it hurts. She is so afraid of his willingness go throw open the gates and she knows she is being selfish but she needs him dammit! She needs him because she wants him to never let go! If only he can put it in words for him to understand but she is now the one afraid of rejection. How many times had she confessed her love to Sasuke and it went nowhere. Now she shows it in her physical affection. It feels a bit degrading to her, to behave soft and feminine, to serve Lee meals, give him back rubs, like an exchange of services. She knows he needs the affection, literally thrives on it and she does enjoy it equally in return as he purrs beneath her touch, but sometimes she wonders if the feeling of being a glorified whore is mutually unwelcomed thought. She loves him dearly and feels guilty for feeling used when she knows he has always loved her. So instead, she shows her love and appreciation anyway that she can, like she always has. 

 

It continues this way. Sakura takes care of Lee and he protects her, trains her and she hopes he is okay with the arrangement as he seems to be but she knows from his silent tears and quietness in bed since they argued that he is suffering alone. She didn’t ask for this and neither did he but it is what it is and she is happy to be his sacred place of solitude.

 

Lee comes home from a month long mission with Sai. Sakura no longer has the clearance for the details of his mission nor his condition even though she is the head of the hospital. She will not ask Kakashi to pull strings knowing fully well what it entails. She is not allowed to visit him.

 

Sakura goes out wearing a henge and buys some expensive, secret gifts from a tiny oddities store at the end of the village that Ino had once raves about. She is surprised to find that it still exist after the war but it was obviously unharmed in the various attacks that leveled the village more than once in the past 20 years. She wins the right to purchase her items from the creepy old grandma in the store through an honest gamble and makes sure to have it gift wrapped so she can have Gai-sensei deliver it to Lee in secret. She makes sure to tell Gai-sensei not to open it and to return it to her if Lee refuses it unopened. Gai-sensei does not question either of them and does as he is asked.

 

After two weeks, Lee is released from the hospital and after a few days more, she comes home to find him in her bed. She giggles as Lee is caught red handed, playing with the items in her “previously waiting on a dipshit” drawer. In his haste to hide the toy, that he has respectfully put a condom on for hygiene purposes, he tumbles off the bed and falls on his nuts. His eyes water and he sobs something thats starts as an apology and ends as some sort of curse. 

 

She does not ask about work. She never does. Instead, she playfully asks if he needs help with their ‘battery operated boyfriend.’ Lee turns red right up to his ears. Sakura chuckle reveals her dirty thoughts and they talk for the first time since that argument as she joins him on the floor. “I’ve missed you, koibito-kun.” Lee’s eyes go wide and his eyebrows hit the ceiling at Sakura’s confession of love. She kisses him passionately before he can recover from the fluttering in his heart. Koibito; the object of my affection. It is a much better greeting than her her previous laugh at his expense and he returns the kiss with fever. She is glad to see that his appearance is well groomed and hopes it is a sign of his returning happiness. Perhaps his mission has also gone well. 

 

Lee cups her face with his hands and kisses her harder. She retrieves the still buzzing object from where it has rolled within reach under the bed and removes the condom inside out. Lee’s breath hitches and he shudders as she presses its pinecone shaped tip back into his entrance. He pulls back from the kiss with a gasp, panting and moaning. It feels so much more intense when it's controlled by someone else. He braces himself with his hands  as his hips thrust up and one eye barely stays open. Sakura chuckles again and begins to stroke his thick erection. 

“Ahh! I’m, sorry, Sakura-san.” He whimpers excuses as his abs contract and relax, “I, I, ah…! I could not wait! I was so aroused by the thought of seeing you again!” His head falls back as she increases speed and he licks his lips. Lee smells like her shampoo from head to toe again. She finds a pair of her panties clutched in his fingers as he raises his knuckle to his lips and bies down with a deep groan. 

“If you like this so much, you can keep it Lee-kun.”

 

She kisses him softly beside the mouth and he flicks his tongue out to find her lips. His hips thrust to meet her palm and the palm sized vibrator pressed an inch inside his ass. He shivvers cries out her name in a shudder. Sakura’s pupils dilate and her eyes widen as Lee begins to gasp sweat between her strokes. He grabs her wrist to stop her strokes, squeezes the base of and his erection and shudders as he tries to hold back. It's too late and he cums on himself while she smiles in delight. Sakura begins to pump again and Lee chokes back his screams. It's too intense as usual, more so with the vibrator on his prostate. He cums more than once, his semen quickly splattering on his chest like spilled milk. Sakura tries to pull the blanket up for him as a shield but Lee stops her, allows himself to be painted with his cream. He watches her with the same half-open eye, between his fanned lashes. He doesn’t know if Sakura is as comfortable with his exhibition as he is but right now he doesn't care. Watching her gasp in shock and arousal just gives him a few more pumps of seed to soak himself with. It’s hot and sticky and he loves the sensation as it hits his body, drips and begins to stick and cool. There is a sparkle to her eyes as he takes in her expression of joy and desire in his haze of bliss. She thinks he is the most fucking beautiful thing she has ever seen and wonders what the hell was wrong with her for not noticing him before! 

 

Sakura leans in and decides to taste some that has hit his chin, feeds it past his lips with her tongue. Lee loses his breath! The moment is too intense! His  heart is bursting and tears stream down his eyes. He grabs by her shoulders gently and leads more than pulls her to the floor beside him, mindful of his mess and kisses her deeply. He is fucking her mouth hard and slow with his tongue and he does not care that he can barely breathe, it just adds to the intensity of the moment for him.

 

Lee pulls back, gasping for air and begins apologizing again. “I was not sure if Sakura-san’s gift was out of desire or to tell me to go fuck myself.” He looks away, “I am assuming that from its, um, nature it is a, um, couple’s item.” Sakura smiles with a twinkle in her eye.

“It is a couples item.” She scruffs up his hair, “Why would I let you go fuck yourself when I enjoy watching you do it.” She pulls back, “Besides, you seem to enjoy it more when I play along.” Lee gasps for air, then drops his head to the floor, “Sakura-chan is such a,” he sighs, “pervert. And I love her even more for it.” 

 

Sakura blushes until her skin matches her hair and Lee breathes deeply, basking in his glow. The words fall from his lips so easily and she wishes she could do the same. She is glad that the strain on their 'relationship’ is fading and she wants him that much more. He lets her go gently and tucks a hand behind his head as she goes to clean his newly pilfered vibrator. He likes it and makes a mental note to thank her for her generosity. 

 

When she returns to clean him up, he refuses, preferring to enjoy the feeling of being wet and sticky, wrapped up in her scent all over the sheet. Sakura smiles and puts a pillow under his head, goes to make dinner. 

 

When she is giving the meal a final stir; long, strong arms wrap around her and she likes the hardness pressed against her bottom, the rock hard abs against her back. He sniffs her hair and places a kiss between her shoulders. She can feel the steam from his freshly showered skin seeping into her clothes where he is pressed against her and a heat crawls up her spine. She turns the stove off, moves the final pot of food to another burner and turns in his arms.

 

“Sakura, my love.” He cups her cheeks in his palms and kisses her sweetly, “I love you.” There are tears in his eyes and he stutters, “I missed you so much! I was so worried!” He hugs her tightly and she gasps softly, then hugs him back. She runs her fingers up and down his back, through his hair. She lets green chakra flow from her fingers into his tense muscles and he sighs with content, resting his head on her shoulder. “Thank you, Sakura-chan.” He steps back and turns, his back pressed to the counter and his head falls back against the cabinets. His eyes flutter shut and he relaxes his brows and frown, content. Even before the war, Sakura has rarely seen Lee so relaxed and well, passive. She wonders how bad his last mission could have have been. She gets distracted by a drop of water that slides from his still damp hair, down his chest and abs, then disappears into the towel slung low on his hips. She bites her lip and pulls away to set the table then pauses. 

 

“Oh um, Lee-kun? I forgot to give you this!” She reaches past him on the counter and he slides an arm around her back, looks deeply into her eyes. His shoujo romance persona is in full bloom and she giggles softly, bites her lip. It’s so cheesy but so very Lee. She pulls back as he leans in to kiss her and he stills at the cool pendant being fastened around his neck. He looks down as the Sakura blossom between his collarbones. He gasps and pulls back, knowing fully what it is.

 

“Sakura, I cannot except this! This is from your jounin promotion! Your father gave you this!” He tries to remove it and she grabs his hands, applies some chakra to her strength with a smirk as he whimpers. 

“Lee, I still have my father but now, I have you, too! Have it, as a luck charm.” She smiles gently as he finally nods, gives a curtsy like a western princess, “A token of my love to my knight in shining armor.” She pats his chest twice and sets the table while he tilts his head and frowns, considering her gift. He closes his hand over it with a soft sigh

“I am most grateful and humbly accept your token of-” 

 

Sakura shoves a dumpling in his mouth. “-sentiment.” She finishes for him and he frowns. She wants to say affection but just loves when he makes that face glares at her. It remind. She chuckles and gives him a quick kiss, then pulls him to the table. Lee is always happy when food is set before him but Sakura does notice he eats with his frown in place. She puts her chopsticks down and threads her fingers through his and gives a squeeze. Lee drops his chopsticks in his anxiety and Sakura laughs before she feeds him. “Lee-kun does know this gift is a token of gratitude, friendship and affection, right?” Her fingers tighten with her strength for emphasis, “Right, Lee-kun?” She bats her lashes at him. Lee chuckles nervously and she gives him a chaste kiss before feeding him another bite of food. Lee’s closed-mouth smile is warm and his ears turn red. He opens his mouth, then closes it. He purses his lips for a moment then tries again.

 

“Sakura-chan. I, I cannot wear this openly in uniform, for your safety, however, I will keep it tucked safely inside my uniform. I am most grateful.” He bows his head and she scruffs up his hair, places a kiss on the spiral cowlick at the top of his head. Lee sniffles and Sakura leans back, tips his chin up. 

“Lee.” She wipes the single tear that escapes and gives his hand a squeeze. “Thank you, too.” He stands up and comes to her, wraps his arms around her.

 

“Sakura-chan-!” He sobs into her hair and gives her a squeeze before he drops to his knees, bows his head. “I am not worthy of your gratitude. In fact, I need to ask for a favour and am afraid to know how you will respond.” She runs her fingers through his hair and he sobs harder. 

“It’s unlike I would say no to you for anything.” She gets to her knees and pulls him to her with his cheeks cupped in her hand. Lee gasps and meets her eyes.

“Sakura-chan. I, I-!” He gulps, “Sai-san has kicked me out of our shared quarters. I am too embarrassed to request a transfer. May I, may I stay here for a few days until a decision can be made?” 

 

Sakura’s eyes dart slightly as she takes in his body language and facial expression. What could have happened between Lee and Sai. Her lips purse in a frown and she growls, lets go of Lee and cracks her knuckles with her fist in her palm. “Just what did he do! I’ll knock some sense into him!” Lee clutches at her wrist.

“No, please don’t! I, it’s all classified!” He bows again, palms to the floor, “I will be happy to sleep on your couch or I can bring my own bedroll. It is small and does not take up much space. I do not own many belongings as I no longer use standard weights in training. I-” She rolls her eyes as he rambles and she pinches his cheek. He yelps and squints his eyes shut but does not move. She smiles softly at him and tilts his chin up again.

 

“Lee, why would you want to sleep on my floor? I have a perfectly good bed and I enjoy sharing it with you,” she blushes, “Maybe a little too much.” He gasps in surprise and she winks at him. His eyes dart a bit before he looks at her again.

“I am most humbled by your praise however I,” he gulps, straightens on his knees and looks away. 

 

“There was an incident on our last mission. Things did not go so well, though we did complete it.” He looks up at her for for a brief second and then looks down. He disciplines himself not to fidget as he continues, seeking words as he pauses, “I am having some trouble with sleep. It is normal for shinobi, especially after the war.” Sakura nods. She doesn’t question him further. “I have added you along with Gai-sensei to my list of next of kin. I hope you are not upset by this. I-!” He hyperventilates a little, holds in a sob, takes a deep breath, lets it go. He does not try again.

 

“Kakashi-sensei also gets nightmares but never on missions.” She strokes Les’s hair and he leans into her touch, “It’s ok, Lee.” He blushes as she hugs him, her small, pert breasts in his face. He deflates into her touch and rest his head against her shoulder. She kisses his cheek, “Lee lets finish dinner.” She smiles wickedly and looks at him, “I see you brought my gift with you?” Lee’s eyes go wide and then he nods.

“Yes. Please?” He whimpers as she slides a hand to his crotch and gives a squeeze. 

“Dinner, Lee-koi. Then dessert.” He shivers with a whimper at her words and agrees to her terms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter will include training between Lee and Sakura. Mayne Gai will supervise, maybe not. 
> 
> Probably a bit of drama will ensure as it is going to and you damn well know it will have more smut. 
> 
> Planned writing:  
> 1) fight/taining scene  
> 2) smut scene  
> 3) eventual m/m/f (boy on boy on girl)


	6. Nothing is fair in love and war

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sakura and Lee train. Lee gets poetic. Sai delivers a mission scroll to Lee, invite Salura to join them for training. Lee makes a confession but hold back many details. Sakura suspects the kind of mission Lee has returned from when an incident occurs. 
> 
> Bonus: Just what kind of couples toy did she buy from that crazy little shop at the end of town? (Same shop used in Boruto when he gets the satwater candy for Himawari.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Triggers: This is where the fic becomes darker.
> 
> BDSM: femdom, anal sex, pegging. This is a hetero-queer chapter.
> 
> PTSD: Lee's PTSD is introduced.
> 
> Dubcon/Noncon elements: References to consentual sexual abuse and Sakura suspects dubcon/noncon or other foul play happens in Lee's training and on his previous missions.

“Too slow!” Lee dodges Sakura’s hits. Punch! Punch! Dodge! They have agreed not use her chakra  enhanced attacks. Fein! Punch! Parry, twist, block! Kick! Lee does not use the gates. This is more of a test of her speed and endurance. She knows he is going easy on her with the speed but does not underestimate her.

 

“Yosh!! Again!” Lee and Sakura dance by the moonlight in one of Lee’s other favourite areas. There is an abandoned well in the bottom where he trained with Tenten to carry a bell underwater. He had nearly drowned but they overcame it together. “Yosh!!” 

 

She makes contact with him, blocking a well-aimed kick and taking the blow with a parry, gives him a good punch that sends Lee flying. He slams against the cavern wall, sticks to it with chakra and launches himself at her. “Here I come!” They dash after each other, spiraling up the walls, circling, falling, parrying, again and again and, “Again!” 

 

They leap towards each other and their blows are so strong they are nearly walking on air as they fight upwards to the mouth of the well. Sakura is getting faster but she knows Lee is going easy on her. She’s only made it to the second gate and is starting to struggle. He isn’t even applying chakra to his attacks. This is no good, she thinks. Even Sasuke could open the first two gates after the chuunin exams without breaking a sweat. 

 

Sakura glows with a pale green aura, trying to conceal it as she heals herself at the bare minimum levels. “Not good enough.” He leaps at her with a flurry of kicks and punches. Sakura falters and goes flying. Lee reaches for her, grabs her hand with the cloth wrapped on his arms. He pulls her towards him as if in a dance, wraps an arm around her and kicks off the wall. 

 

“Enough.” He whispers in her ear as he lands, letting her find the ground beneath her feet. She steadies herself with a hand on his chest and he steps back, let's go. “If you cannot hide that from my naked eyes, how do you expect it to get past Sasuke?” She stops her foot.

“It's only until I can tolerate the pain!” 

“Then you will never accept the pain and use it.” He frowns, tilts his head, “You cannot master your body without mastering your will. You are hindering yourself.”

 

Sakura shoves at him with a small grunt, applying chakra and Lee hits the wall. He slumps to the floor laughing and sits as she fumes. Sakura has sent him over the whole in the cavern that is now between them. Lee sits, takes out a bottle of water and drinks it. It’s a nice feeling to be back in his bright green spandex and flak jacket rather than the sleeveless, dark, hunter green anbu attire. Even Sakura feels Lee looks brighter in it, happier. 

 

She smiles softly, sits and drinks her own bottle. Lee has been so quiet again and it scares her. It’s so nice to hear him laugh, his voice ringing like a shrine bell. She takes a deep breath and smiles, scoots forward to drop her feet into the mouth of the well. Sakura kicks her feet, admires the reflection of the moon; it illuminates the water in the well; the light dances against the cavern wall. Lee takes a sip and lets his head fall back against the smooth, cool stone behind him. He whispers as he watches the reflected light from the well dance all over her skin.

 

“Beautiful.” His face lights up with a thought as he looks at her. “Yozakura.” Lee whispers. Sakura looks up before he continues, “‘So great is the attraction of cherry blossoms seen by the light of the pale moon, that they have even been given the special name of Yozakura or night cherry flowers.’ (Florence Du Cane, The Flowers and Gardens of Japan,1908)” He smiles wider and gives a thumbs up, with his eyes closed, “To watch cherry blossoms by moonlight was my favorite thing our generation did at festivals. The cherry blossoms blushing beauty intensifies surrounded by the darkness of the night.” 

 

Lee smiles softly and takes another sip as Sakura blushes. Her hand finds a fist sized geode stone. She debates throwing it at his head like she would Naruto or Sai but crumbles it in her fist instead; it's rainbow agate within turning to dust. Sakura looks at it for a moment, then throws the glitter she had made high into the air. Its powder reflects like freshly fallen snow in the light of the moon, illuminated further by the water in the center of the cave. All of her friends are like geodes; they have all been broken open, destroyed to reveal their beauty; Lee has always been her ugly rock but he is the most precious and rare beauty she has ever had the pleasure of knowing. Lee is more than just a geode. He is her sparking green diamond in the rough, more refined with the pressures of the earth. Even now he sparkles brilliantly as she falls  with him the closer she gets. 

 

After so many years with her perverted blond teammate, Naruto, constantly asking her out and saying and doing inappropriate things, Sai trying strange things he has read in books and calling her ugly, Sasuke rejecting her and treating her like shit and Kakashi’s 'concerns’ of what is 'becoming of a lady’ it is even harder for her now to accept Lee’s frequent, abstract compliments. His eyes flutter closed once more as he tips his head back and his smile relaxes. She knows he means every word of his deep descriptions. She feels unworthy. This thing is all her fault! If only Naruto and Kakashi had allowed her to fight! Sasuke was near his limits! 

 

Instead of being able to take the compliment, her fingers dig into the rocks, turning the edges she touches to pebbles that echo in the water below, sending small echoes of the waters laughter to taunt her. She debates Lee’s words and knows his intentions are in her best interest. She won't admit that to him though. Lee caps his flask and tucks it away in his pouch. He sits up, dusting himself off. “I’d love to watch my cherry tree blush all night but we must train.” 

 

His cherry tree? His? Sakura belongs to no one. She grinds more dirt in his hand and Lee chuckles before he pushes her off the edge and into the water. Sakura floats on the surface, holding on by chakra as the cool, smooth water ripples. Lee does not make a sound as he dives in behind her. He circles beneath the surface then pulls her down by her ankles. They surface with Sakura sputtering and Lee smiles his big dopey grin, dares to get within her range. He gets punched again and goes flying out of the cavern. When he comes to, his head is buzzing with gentle electricity and pink hair blocks his vision in the moonlight. His eyes flutter open and he reaches for her cheeks, “Saki-koi is even more beautiful by moonlight.” Saki, blossom of hope, koi, my love. Sakura stops her healing glow.

 

“Do you to get smacked again, Lee-kun?” She says his name with mock sweetness. He chuckles when she blushes again but she does resist his touch as he caresses her cheeks so he leans up, pulls her down and kisses her upside down like that with his head in her lap. Her soft moan is muffled by his lips but he lets go abruptly and slides out of her lap, rises to his feet in one swift movement.

 

“Sumi-Taichou.” Captain Black-Ink. Sakura looks up at who Lee is addressing. Is there even a need for the codename? Even with the mask, she knows who it is. The exposes midriff of pale skin as white as paper can only belong to one man she knows.

“Nagame-kun.” Sai steps off of his bird. He takes in the soaking wet couple before him but pays no mind. “Haruno-san.” Sai says after a beat, trying to maintain respect but he is in uniform; he keeps to formal greetings and honorifics. Sakura knows him well enough that she can sense his hesitation is out of awkwardness and not disrespect. Lee’s intensity kicks into high gear and he makes a fist, purses his lips. Sakura stands and takes his hand in hers. He threads his finger through her and she gives him a gentle squeeze. 

 

Sai bows with a hand above his heart. “I apologize but the Hokage has need of us again. I know you have a few days left of leave bit this matter is urgent.” Sai pulls the scroll from his jacket and hands it to Lee. Lee frowns when he reads it. He hands it back for Sai to destroy with a hand sign.

“Could you not have sent a bird?” Sai pauses before responding, “I did. You refused it.” Sakura can cut the tension before her with a butterknife. Sai continues, “Have you recovered substantially.” Lee tries to hide the sound of his teeth grinding.

“Yes, Captain.” Sai eyes him for a moment, then turns away. 

“You look well but I will petition that our Hokage insist on giving you a few more days to prepare yourself.” He lifts his mask and faces Sakura, “It is good to see you again, Sakura-chan.” She clenches her fist this time.

“Wish I could say the same.” Sai does not flinch but pauses again.

“I am sorry, Sakura-chan. I cannot discuss this matter with you but perhaps you will learn soon enough what happened.” He turns and mounts his bird, “I apologize again for interrupting your night. I will send a messenger bird, again, if the Hokage wishes you to leave immediately. If not, do enjoy your leisure time. Perhaps you would like to train with us some time, Sakura-chan. Lee-kun.” Sai bows, Lee bows. Sai replaces his mask and is gone again. 

 

Once he is out of sight, Lee turns his head, hugs Sakura tightly against his side and kisses her as his tears begin to fall. “Lee-kun?” She pulls back and he closes his eyes.

“Please, do not ask.” He shakes his head, “Not yet but perhaps soon I may be ready to tell you. May we go home?” He shivers and it's not because they are soaking wet, he looks at her sideways with a smile and adds, “I would love to experience the extension of yourself that you most graciously purchased for  our pleasure, if you would humour me.” Sakura blushes from head to toe and stiffens but she nods before tugging him towards home. She pauses and gives Lee a mock bow.

“I'd be honoured!” 

 

There is nothing that makes her happier than watching a good training session then Lee come undone. He can’t believe he accepted her strange gift. She pauses and turns to him, walks backwards with a skip in her step, “Although, Ino would say, ‘That was the hottest eye-fucking I’ve seen in awhile. You can cut that sexual tension with a  knife!’” Lee groans and whines with a sob like when he was a genin. He makes his best puppy face,

“Sakura-chan...” Then he giggles and smiles. If only she knew how spot on she was. He is afraid of those consequences.

 

“Ahh!! Arrrghhhhaaaaahhhhh!!!” Lee stands in the doorway of their bedroom with Sakura before him. Sakura has a few more toys that she has re-gifted to her new new favourite bad boy. They have spent time setting the mood but not in the typical romantic way of the average couple. The lights are off and sound suppression seals are in place.“Sakura-sama.” He stutters with a shiver, his fingers splintering the wood where he stands bound by his will and desire alone. Candlelight flickers in the room but he cannot see it beneath his hataiiate, tied well over his eyes. “Please, I beg you, mercy.” His legs are shaking as the candle mounted on the ceiling above drips waxs down his back in its own intervals. He gasps as she removes her fingers from inside him and replaces it with a lubricated silicone toy. He arches into her touch and she kisses him hungrily. He moans into her mouth and she pulls away. He leans forward, searches greedily with his tongue for the ice cube he knows is going pressed to his lips by hers. 

 

“Mmm.. ah…” He pants into the open, sloppy kiss, the cube melting between their mouths. The cold liquid drips down his body and he shivers as more wax dribbles down his back, runs over his ass and some trails down his crack. It cools as it reaches his thighs. He leans back when she pulls away, lets the ice cube sit in his cheek amd with a moan, he leans back to let the wax drip lazily over his beck and chest. 

 

“Oh god…” He moans as she begins to pump the toy within him, her seal in place on his rock. It glows as it twitches. Besides the hataiiate, Sakura was shocked tonight to learn that Lee wears tight fishnet from neck to ankle under his emerald green spandex; besides his hataiiate, it is the only thing he wears now. He bites back a moan, fingers shaking as he grips the door. Sakura guides his thigh, allows him to open his legs wider and put one on her bathroom stool on the floor. He pants, breaking a sweat as she sucks his nipples. Sakura alternates with sips of green tea and chocolate ice cream. She pulls him forward into a kiss when he swallows the ice cube. He moans, trying to thrust against her without her permission. She grants it anyways and he smiles, head falling back again when she puts a spoon of ice cream in his mouth, rewarding bad behaviour. It grits on his nerves when she does it; it breaks his personal morals of self-rule. His body shakes and shivers as she removes the necklace from around his neck, lets the cool shell run smoothly over his flesh. 

 

Sakura replaces the toy with a silicone vibrator that has been soaked in ice water and orders him to keep it there. His body trembles and his erections twitches, the head dark and swollen. It is the sweetest torture as she takes this toy out as well and replaces it with one from a pot of boiled water. 

 

“My goddess, mercy.” Lee whimpers softly and Sakura slips between his legs, blows out the candle. She slips back under and thrusts the toy within him. Lee trembles as she licks his balls and twist the toy as she pulls it back to the tip, then enters him with it again. He groans a chokes whimper as she pumps his cock. 

 

“Sakura-sama.” She loves how it tumbles from his lips, how he throws his head back and grabs the door frame when she takes as much of his length as possible in her mouth. She grabs his hips so he cannot move, claws her fingers against his ass then slides out the toy, replacing it with her gloved fingers. 

“Shh.” She coos and he bites his lip, trembles as he chokes in another growl.

“Please, let me touch you, Sakura-sama.” His hands slide up and down the frame and he sucks in a gasp of air as she pulls off, licks slowly up his thighs, sucks and bites them. 

 

“Goddamnit. Yaaaghh!” He yelps as she gives him playful slap to the thigh, shushes him, then resumes her work. His smile widens as she works him over good and he breathes begin to even out again as he submits to pleasure. “Fuck, I, I love you, Saki-koi. Mmmm…” He purrs but when he begins to whimper again, she pulls away. He whines as his body trembles at the loss of her touch and he begins to beg for her, “Sakura…” He hears rustling and goes silent. He stills his breath as his heart flutters in anticipation. She’s really going to do this. His Sakura is giving into his desires, their desires. 

 

“Not yet, baby.” She kisses him hard, runs her hands up and down his body. “My turn first.” Sakura rolls the condom on in excitement, licking and kissing his hardened nipples. His skin is so firm yet pliant beneath her tongue and she nips him with a soft moan. She rubs the wax from the soy candle all over his skin in its oiled state and he breathes deeply, waits patiently. “Attention, soldier.” Lee snaps his legs closed and puts his arms at his side. Sakura walks around him, her nails gently scraping his skin as her fingertips trail his skin. She hums in approval then slaps his thigh a few times in succession, just enough to sting. 

 

“Spread.” He does as commanded. She presses up against his back and he can feel her body heat where the oil has cooled on his flesh, rehardening like frosting over his skin. The only thing vanilla is the candles, blended with cherry and peach. Sakura slides her arms around him and pinches a nipple, pulls gently with a tiny twists as he gasps and tenses. She lifts something to his lips. Its soft and rubbery but flavourless. 

 

“Suck.” She commands and suckles what he identifies as a phallic shaped object. He tests its length with his tongue and realizes it also has other bulbus ridges. He gasps and sucks it further into his mouth. Its firm but pliable and he squirms at the empty feeling inside of him. Lee wants to be filled. If even for a moment, it helps to fill the holes that he can't since the war. Sakura kisses between his shoulder blades, licks the flavoured oil-based wax, hums and iggles in pleasure. 

 

“Goddamn, I never knew you were such a pervert, Lee-kun!” She slides the object from his mouth and he whimpers. He was not always a pervert but since he awakened his desire, he can’t stop, even when he doesn’t like himself for breaking his virtues. Pain is something he has made friends with though finding the border where it becomes pleasure and sex is just an extension of his sweet addiction. “Do you like having things like that in your mouth?” Lee begins to blush from head to toe and whimpers again. He loves when she is vulgar and she knows it. Goddamn, she knows what she is doing to him.

 

“I, I am shy, Sakura-sama. Please, do not ask such things when I am exposed!” Sakura winces. She thought she was doing a good job at playing this game. Lee continues after a pause, “I love that you enjoy exploring my body, my desires but, mmm,” he takes a deep breath and sighs. He does not like any indication of morals or values. “Please, do not mock my sexual preferences as it does not entice nor please me. Lee takes a deep breath and straightens corrects his posture. “Please, Saki-koi. Do not stop the game. I humbly beg you!” Sakura holds in a sigh of relief, terrified that she had offended him. She may be the one calling the shots now but really, he has all the power. She wants to please Lee even more than he needs Sakura’s feedback. She knows he want to throw himself on the floor in apology and is just obeying the rules of the game not to move from his position in the doorway.

 

She agrees with an enthusiastic hum. She lubricates the toy, not warming the gel in her hands. Lee likes it when he is surprised by its cold wetness. He gasps and pants as she thrust it. She wraps an arm around his abdomen for support and Lee leans his shoulder against the door frame, falting as Sakura takes hold and pumps his entire length hard and smooth over the condom. He chokes back shuddering moans and leans into it unabashedly. She pumps and thrusts it, letting him writhe and squirm, knowing far too well her seal prevents him from release. She finally pushes it fully inside him once more and lets him adjust as she pumps the base with her fingers. He falters as he tries to straighten. She has found his favourite spot and all he can do is pant, shake, drool. His body shutters and he cums dryly without release. He yelps, sucking in air as he tries to straighten. It takes him a few moments to find his feet and he shudders as he straightens. He gets a stroke from his hair all the way down his ass and a good squeeze for doing as is expected of him. 

 

“Are you ready for a reward my pet?” He nods, still blindfolded and she slides her hands up and down his chest, then slips her arms around his neck and hoists herself up. He adjusts his stance in the door frame to accommodate her, bending his knees, corrects the placement of his feet. She is so light for him and the position is to enjoy the ride. He raises his arms and grabs the top of the frame as she sinks down on him. He gives a huff then he moans deeply as she writhes and moves on him. He grits his teeth and throws his head back. This time there are rules. He asks for them. He likes structure. He also likes  to deny himself until he has earned something. No touching, no speaking, no moving. Fuck the rules! He wraps an arm around her and digs his fingers into the doorframe. 

 

“Uggghrrraaaahhhh!!! Fuuuuuuck!!!” Lee growls and yells as she takes herself on him. Her abdomen slides against gis slick skin as she slithers like a snake and grinds down as she lets gravity help her work. His arm is crossed against the small of her back and he grips her ass, gasping and sobbing into her movements. She bites his shoulder and licks with her tongue in circles, suckling, darting lapping. She hums and purrs her deep moans and he can feel lightning running up and down his spin, through his nipples, straight to his cock .“Ahhhhh!!!!!” 

 

Sakura smiles, tries her best not to make any more sounds, not to touch him beyond supporting herself and where they are joined; she wants to deprive him of sensation. She leans back and bends until her hands touch the floor and she tells him to out his hands back at the top of the frame. She orders him not to move and he complies as she grinds him slow and hard, letting her pelvic floor crunch and release him. He gasps and sobs, trying desperately to hold back.

“I’m so hard it hurts. Please, mercy.” Tears stream down his face as his chest heaves. His thighs shake as he strains against the urge to grab her and take her roughly. He grits his teeth and grinds into her. “Mercy, beloved.”

 

“Only until you make me cum.” Sakura singsong playfully. She knows his is almost beyond control and she has to free him before he does something he regrets and hates himself. He would never force his desires on her. He seeks her with his fingers pressing gently, takes her by the hips and pulls out to reposition her. He turns her expertly and puts her into a scissors face down, her legs in the air, his hands gripping her thighs. He takes her, hard and slow. He wants to draw this out but his balls are aching and she squeezes his cock deep with her, her ass squeezing the excess of his length as he slides in and out, grinds into her. He begins to count out loud and before he can hit 25, his hips are snapping forward into her and he squeezes his ass against the toy deep inside him each time he pulls back. He goes faster and harder, getting lost in the sensation.  

 

100; he is pulling her up to meet his thrusts, twists both his hips and hers just right through each fluid movement, setting a rhythm. He responds to the feel of her body  the ension as she flexes and holds onto him.She begins panting and he chuckles as he hears her biting back her soft yelps of pleasure. Lee is convinced she is a mountain goddess, a kitsune come to possess him, to turn him into a madman. 

 

500 and Lee slows down from his brutal pace, not wanting to let her cum yet as she falters. He pulls her back up against his chest, kisses her rough as he grinds. 750 and he is taking her relentlessly. 900 she is sobbing into his biceps, suckling and biting his nipples as she twists her tongue. He still grips the door frame with one hand. 

 

His sobs become evenly spaced grunts and moans; Lee is long past begging and crying. He wants to torture her, to rob her of her orgasm. 950 and she cums hard again, takes him harder as the pressure builds. She makes him take the frame with both hands and stay still as she gasps and cries, rides out her orgasm.  999; Lee whimpers and nearly falls to his knees as she stops. 

 

Sakura plants her feet on his thighs and pulls off with with an audible sigh of pleasure, whimper or three for good measure. She knows he is one number off from a goal and she smiles wide, playful. She knows it irritates the hell out of him to be interrupted or fail. He can't see her smile but he can hear the satisfaction in her giggles. 

 

Lee drops his head back and sighs, his breath ragged. He doesn’t know how patient he can be, especially with her belittling him like this. Lee can take any amount of physical torture but verbal insults have never been his specialty. He hears the bottle of lube and gasps in anticipation; uses his training to calm his breaths. Lee hears her fastening her harness and he squirms; his thighs want to rub together. He can feel the wetness of the previous lube cooling and drying on his ass. He wants her, wants her inside him right now! 

 

Sakura slaps the outsides of his thighs for him to close them.  She rounds him, inspecting him, licks at some of the flavoured oil still slick on his body. “Mmm…” She sighs, “Are you ready for that dessert now, my beautiful, wild beast?” Lee hums at the name. Her. Beautiful. Beast. Goddamn. He shivers, dying to kiss her.

 

Lee hears the wood splinter as he shudders again, arches his spine as Sakura slips her hand between his thighs. She coos playfully and pumps the anal plug beads within him. He whimpers, his head rolling to his shoulder, then she yanks it gentle but swift, gives him the bare minimum to adjust as she feels his body resist. He is shaking as she grasps his hips and gives his cock a good, long suck and she drops the toy into the warm bucket and tucks it aside. He tips his head back with a sob then raises his legs as her fingers brush the back of his thighs. He feels the length of silicone. It’s big, nearly as big as himself against his thigh and  

 

“Wait!” He purses his lips tightly and moans as she presses the tip against his entrance. “I want to see you, my love.” He pulls her toward himself, thighs over her hips and ankles crossed behind her ass. She grabs his cheeks and pulls him down into a hard, heavy kiss. She unties his red hataiiate from his head, their tongues battling each other, not for dominance but in mutual desperation for pleasure. 

“Lee…” She whimpers his name, kisses him softly with a sensual press of her lips to his and he meets it equally slow. They pull away to lock their gaze together and he thrusts his head towards hers, presses their foreheads together. He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath.

 

“I am ready, my love.” He does not hesitate further. He kisses her soft, lips sliding across hers before he pushes his tongue inside her mouth and she pushes her strapon inside of him. His eyes go wide with a gasp as he chokes on his breath. She allows his body to guide her, slides her hands around his waist and massages his lower back with her hands and chakra. She squeezes and presses firmly, alternating expertly. Lee arches his back, sobs as his head falls back with a shuddering gasp. “S-Sakura-hime.” He cries out loudly as she sucks and bites his chest and shoulders, licks up his clavicle to his neck. She sucks his ear and moans playfully. “Oh fuck! It feels so good!” He screams, Nyaaaaahh-ha!!! Ghhhhyyyyaahh!!!” His body begins to weaken and she pulls him to her, holds him close and his cock rides between the valley of her breasts. Her biceps push them together well enough as she uses her monster strength to take him. 

 

“Oh god… Ahhh…. Sakura... Harder! Please!” She complies and moans against his his skin where his fishnets end against his collar. She loves how convenient the open critch area is between his thighs, loves the way the black stretchy netting accentuates his toned, tight body. He loves how her breasts stand off her biceps slightly as she fucks him, his cock sliding greedily. It pokes her in the chin on the way up and he leans down, using his flexibility and kisses her. She bends down and licks his cock. Lee is feeling fucking adventurous so he adjusts his posture, leans down and licks himself as well. 

 

“Oh my god!!” Sakura screams. It’s so fucking erotic. She stumbles back and Lee pushes off the door frame with some chakra. He wraps his arms and thighs around her, leans his weight so she stumbles to the bed. Her knees hit the back of the bed and as they fall, Lee uses his agility to make heir landing softer. He immediately begins to rock himself as Sakura lays her head back and watches him. Lee folds his hands over her belly, overlaps one hand over the other and then his big, thick length is thrusting between his forearms for her to admire. She tilts her hip to make a saddle, her head at the foot of the bed. Lee lifts up, reaches back for a pillow. He folds it, slips it under her ass to support her. He corrects her posture, the position of her legs, then sits into the saddle he has made. 

 

Lee’s head rolls back and he watches her through his lashes for a moment before he loses himself to the sensation of being filled by the woman he has loved since he was a genin. Tears gather in his eyes and he blinks them away, begins to sob in both pleasure and disbelief. “Sakura-hime…” He slows down, wanting to feel each and every spot that gives him pleasure get brushed how he wants it. She learns his rhythm and before long he rests his forehead to hers as he begins to shudder. 

 

Sakura pants and her eyes also fill with tears; tears of sorrow and joy. If they fought so hard for peace and happiness, why does she feel so guilty. She can feel the built-in dildo inside of her rock with each of his movements, her clitorus stimulated by the pressure and friction of thrusting into him and she screams, cries as he presses his forehead to hers and kisses her deeply with a moan. His tears taste salty but her heart is exploding with emotion. She pulls back and begins whimpering like a mantra.

 

“Lee, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” Lee leans back and smiles at her, continues to take her as she writhes and cries out, gasping and moaning.

“For what, my love?” He sweeps her bangs back from her face, kisses her forehead. It makes her blush. It makes her blush because she has always hated her big forehead and Lee thinks it's the most beautiful bing he has ever seen, like Naruto. It's her fault Naruto is dead, Kakashi is a love slave, Captain Yamato was tortured… She has so much to apologize for and yet here she is, busy fucking the man that is training her instead of focusing on the training itself and in the dirtiest way possible. She wants to completely ravage him, lost to the her lust in the moment. He fills the hole inside of her with his surrender. She puts her hands on his chest with a sigh of satisfaction and longing.  She pushes him up a bit, leans back. “I was such a bitch to you and Naruto and you deserve better. You both deserved better. And Naruto. Naruto-!!” She pushes herself away from him, ashamed, and sobs.

 

“No, no. Not now. Please, don’t cry!” His voice is breaking as his own tears bubble up, ready to burst. Lee swallows them down, takes her hands in his, threads their fingers and gives her a sweet, loud kiss on her cheek. “Please, Sakura-hime. Look at me.” He kisses beside her mouth as she continues to look away, his grinding comes to a half. “Sakura-chan!” Kisses pepper her body everywhere that he can reach and he begins to suckle her neck gently, kisses behind her ear. He is so close, so close to begging to cum and he will throw it all away to console her. “Kakashi-sensei, loves you. Gai-sensei, loves you. Yamato-senpai loves you. Naruto-loved you.” Her eyes clamp tight and she sobs. “Look at me.” He brushes his fingers through her hair, “I have faith in you.” He kisses her forehead and wraps his arms around her, “We will survive this and we will protect our senseis.” She finally looks up at him but his eyes are as unsure as her own, “I promise, Sakura! On my life! You are my ninja way! I love you Saki-koi!” His sincerity is back and she accepts it when he kisses her. Their kissing turns into a slow grind as they make out. Their pace builds as their intense feelings fuel their bond, their desires. Lee performs for her again as he enjoys himself, builds them back to a plateau. Before long he is sweating again, panting, sighing and his smell is intoxicating. Sakura licks him all over, suckles his biceps. He leans forward and frots, writhing with his cock pressed between their bellies. He is panting and sighing and she is sobbing in equal disarray.

 

“Sakura!” His voice cracks and he grabs his cock, arches his back and begins to stroke himself. Please!! Let me cum. The intensity is too much! It hurts!” He smiles, his brows furrowed in concentration, “Please. I wan't to cum with you, my love.” She strokes his hair, smiles and grabs him by the hair at the back of his head. Lee squeals and she kisses him hard. “Have you been a good boy my sweet Lee.” He moans into her mouth and pulls away with a string of saliva, gives her a dirty look as he quints at her with a winks.

“Mercy.” He straddles her on his heels, grinds back and down with soft moans, taking himself as he jerks himself off, pins her hips down with his strength and chakra. She grasps Lee by the hair, pulls him down again and kisses him hard. She wraps her thighs up and over his hips and slides her hands down his back, gets to her knees and he straddles her again. 

“Come with me, baby.” She sits back on her heels and rocks into him, slow, hard, steady. Her fingers trail down firmly to his ass and she works her dirers within him. They gasps and moan, kissing as they lean back and forth, letting the sensations build one last time. “Oh fuck! Oh fuck! S-Sssakura-c-chan! Ahhrrrhaaaagghhhh!” She slides the condom off, throws it over his shoulder onto the floor and releases the seal within him.

 

Lee’s eyes go wide, unfocused as his body shakes. The seal always makes him cum so hard! He soaks them both with his cum as she grasps his cock and pumps hard, her other hand deep within his ass. Sakura lays back and Lee slides his body over hers, bends one leg up and he forces her shoulders to the bed and rides her madly. She arches off the mattress as Lee screams, throws his head back and thrusts harder. “Yosh!! Ahhhh!!” Sakura laughs playfully as Lee comes undone. This has been the strangest but most intimate sez she has even had with him. He closes his eyes and turns his head slowly away as he panta hars and uses her dildo as, well, a dildo. His chest heaves as his cum paints him one last time as he points it towards his chest and gives it a last squeeze along with Sakura. He takes a few deep breaths and collapses, pulling her sideways with him as he falls. He rolls onto his back with a cry as she slips out of him and his arms rest above his head. She watches him in adoration, curls up on his side with a thigh over his and kisses him on the cheek. 

 

“Hmm… Lee-kun. I am starting to like you a lot.” Lee looks over with his frown in place, rolls his eyes and sighs.

“I hoped you would.” Lee chuckles and Sakura starts to giggle. He smiles with a weak attempt at a thumbs up. “Please be my girlfriend! I will protect you with my life!” If she says no, I’ll die!

“Yes!” She turns and kisses him hard, “Oh, fuck, yes, Lee! Mmph!” He cuts her off, returns the kiss just as hard then they collapse to the bed and snuggle. From now on, she has made up her mind that Lee is a freak in the best way possible. He is her freak in bed and that’s more than she will ever deserve. 

 

“My Yozakura is my sweet little pervert and I love her more for it.”

“Can it you hopeless, romantic pervert. Master Jiraiya would be proud of you.” She snuggles against his side, head against his shoulder. “Goddamn and you are so loud when you’re fucked senseless.” She mumbles it but her tone is more affectionate than annoyed. It even sounds a bit like praise. Lee chuckles warmly.

“And you love it my equally perverted pinkette.” Lee gives a final kiss to the tip of her nose. The rumble in Lee’s voice evens into a deep sigh then a soft snore as Sakura pulls the blanket up. She smiles wickedly. Goodluck to Lee getting his fishnets off in the morning, glued to him with his own spunk. She doubt Lee really cares and she admits that doesn’t care either.

 

“Lee-kun.” Sakura whispers with a sleepy drawl, struggles against his hold, “Lee-kun! I’m going to be late for work.” She writhes in his grip and Lee frowns, whimpers in his sleep as if he is in pain. His fingers instantly finds her throat.

 

Sakura tries to pry at his fingers and grunts. In a split second, she tumbles to the floor, her body is in a hold before she can gasp. She is face down on the floor, one arm behind her back and her body is pinned by his. Lee cries out in rage, his hand poised in a claw-figured grip, ready to crush her windpipe of she moves. “Lee-kun. It’s Sakura!” She gasps against the pressure at her throat. It takes a moment for his panting to stop and he releases her, sated.

 

“Sakura-sama! I am so very sorry!” He backs up quickly until he hits the wall with a thud. He releases the breath he is holding and begins cry, the heels of his palm digging into his eyes. He runs his fingers through his hair with one hand and the other bites his knuckle, drawing blood from his uncovered skin. “I’m so sorry.” He shudders and turns away.

“Lee. It’s okay. I’m alright!” She slides over and reaches a hand towards him slowly. Lee cries harder, flinches away.

 

“I am sorry one thousand times! I should have slept on the couch! I-! I am sorry one thousand times more!” Lee bows, forehead and palms to the floor, then curls into a ball in the corner of her room and rocks slightly. Sakura takes the blanket from the bed and wraps it around him. He allows her to finally touch him but shudders, pulls away. 

“Oh god, Lee. Is this why-?” He nods. Then Lee nods again without hesitation.

 

“Sai is afraid of me now. He does not trust to sleep near me! After our last mission-!” He swallows, changes his words as he closes his eyes and shakes his head. The mission itself is classified. “I came home like this three days ago and Sai had enough of this the first night.” He grips her arms around him, “I promise you, Sakura-san. I will sleep on your couch! I, I have nowhere else to go!” Sakura nods. Lee’s old room at Gai’s house is occupied by Captain Yamato and she knows Lee would hate for Gai to see him this way. She hugs him a little tighter and he falls asleep in her arms, clearly exhausted from his nightmares. She carries him back to bed and tucks him in. Sai has not sent a bird so she assumes Lee is off duty for a few more days. She has to get to work and reluctantly gets ready to leave. With a gentle kiss to his forehead, she pulls the blanket up over his shoulder, undeterred by his previous actions and leaves when he sighs in content. 

 

When she sees Sai again, she has a surprise knuckle sandwich for him hiding in her fist and his name is scrawled on it with the most elegant calligraphy. She wants to know what happened on that mission, regardless of it being Sai’s fault or not.

 

“Lee-kun.” Her alarm clock is ringing. She doesn't know Lee to sleep past sunrise, even when he is completely chakra depleted and physically exerted. Sakura whispers with a sleepy drawl, struggles against his hold, “Lee-kun! I’m going to be late for work.” She writhes in his grip and Lee frowns, whimpers in his sleep as if he is in pain. She pries at his fingers and grunts. 

 

In a split second, she tumbles to the floor, her body is in a hold before she can gasp. She is face down on the floor, one arm behind her back and her body is pinned by his. Lee cries out in rage, his hand poised in a claw-figured grip, ready to crush her windpipe of she moves. “Lee-kun. It’s Sakura!” She gasps against the pressure at her throat. It takes a moment for his panting to stop and he releases her. 

 

“Sakura-sama! I am so very sorry!” He backs up quickly until he hits the wall with a thud. He releases the breath he is holding and begins cry, the heels of his palm digging into his eyes. He runs his fingers through his hair with one hand and the other bites his knuckle, drawing blood from his uncovered skin. “I’m so sorry.” He shudders and turns away.

“Lee. It’s okay. I’m alright!” She slides over and reaches a hand towards him slowly. Lee cries harder, flinches away.

“I am sorry one thousand times! I should have slept on the couch! I-! I am sorry one thousand times more!” 

 

Lee bows, forehead and palms to the floor, then curls into a ball in the corner of her room and rocks slightly. Sakura takes the blanket from the bed and wraps it around him. He allows her to finally touch him but shudders, pulls away from her. When she tries to withdraw respectfully from him, he grasps her hands desperately. “Please! Don’t pull away!”

“My sweet Lee!” She tries not to pity him, “Is this why-?” He nods. Then nods again. He swallows hard and wipes his tears.

“This is why Sai is afraid of me now. He does not trust to sleep near me! After our last mission-!” He swallows, changes his words as he closes his eyes and shakes his head. The mission itself is classified. 

 

“I came home like this three days ago and Sai had enough of this the first night.” He grips her arms around him, “I promise you, Sakura-san. I will sleep on your couch! I, I have nowhere else to go! Yet, I have hurt you!” Sakura nods and kisses his head. Lee’s old room at Gai’s house is occupied by Captain Yamato and she knows Lee would hate for Gai to see him this way. 

“Lee, I am fine and you will never be  a burden to me so please, calm down and stop beating yourself up.” He shivers, then nods as she kisses his neck, suckles gently. His head rolls back  with a moan and he relaxes into her touch. She hugs him a little tighter and he falls asleep in her arms, clearly exhausted from his nightmares.

 

Sakura carries him back to bed easily with a little chakra infused muscle and tucks him in. Sai has not sent a bird so she assumes Lee is off duty for a few more days. She has to get to work and reluctantly gets ready to leave. With a gentle kiss to his forehead, she pulls the blanket up over his shoulder, undeterred by his previous actions and leaves when he sighs in content. He places the Sakura-blossom necklace onto the nightstand from where it had fallen beneath the bed, hoping he understands its hidden meaning. He has never given up on her and she will not abandon him.

 

When she sees Sai again, she has a surprise knuckle sandwich for him hiding in her fist and his name is scrawled on it with the most elegant calligraphy she can muster. She wants to know what happened on that mission, regardless of it being Sai’s fault or not.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have two more chapters written (in editing). Chapter 8 is likely the last but will include notes for multiple endings incase I don't continue it. 
> 
> The next chapter contains some intense elements: a 3some, Lee nearly dies opening the gates, angsty/bittersweet sex.

**Author's Note:**

> If you like his fic please kudos/comment/subscribe. I do accept constructive criticism and enjoy responding to feedback.


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